Hillarious... my mother sent me this...


Are we sure that Jesus was Jewish?

Two things suggest he was JEWISH:
1. He took up his father's profession.
2. He lived with his parents until he was 33, believed that his mother was a virgin, and thought he was God.
BUT -
Three things suggest he was MEXICAN:
1. His first name was Jesus.
2. He was bilingual.
3. He was always in trouble with the cops.
Three things suggest he was BLACK:
1. He called everyone "brother."
2. He loved Gospel.
3. He couldn't get a fair trial
Three things suggest he was ITALIAN:
1. He spoke with his hands.
2. He drank wine with every meal.
3. He worked in construction.
Three things suggest he was CALIFORNIAN:
1. He never cut his hair.
2. He went barefoot.
3. He started a new religion.
Three things suggest he was QUEBECOIS:
1. He never married.
2. He continually told incredible stories.
3. St. John the Baptist was one of his best friends.

Three things, however, prove that he was undoubtedly a WOMAN:
1. With no provisions, and on five minutes notice, he could feed a large crowd.
2. He was continually explaining his message to men who, despite their best intentions, could never understand him.
3. Although dead, he still had to get up, because he had more work to do.