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Thread: I think I just killed my patient!

  1. #1
    Eyes eastward... Uilleann's Avatar
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    I think I just killed my patient!

    I'm fairly certain after dispensing these little beauties, that all the blue light will sear into his brain, riding that pervasive government carrier wave, cause both retinas to spontaneously burst into flame, and quite possibly induce scurvy and/or syphilis! That is all, of course, in addition to the obvious shifting of the earth's axis melting the ice caps and causing global devastation, the imminent random asteroid impacts, and the fifteen or so black holes now orbiting towards the solar system to consume us all.

    Sorry guys. But he really wanted BLUE lenses! So dats what he gots!

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  2. #2
    OptiBoard Professional ThePinkRanger's Avatar
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    hahahahahahahahaha

    better to see the chem trails with!

  3. #3
    OptiBoard Professional Dustin.B's Avatar
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    I've been told that by using blue lenses like these you can clearly see the ghost of Benedict Arnold at your local Arbys.
    ~Dustin B. AboC

    "Laugh, or you will go crazy."

  4. #4
    Eyes eastward... Uilleann's Avatar
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    I just saw Benedict Cumberbach - that's like the same right?

  5. #5
    OptiBoard Professional Dustin.B's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Uilleann View Post
    I just saw Benedict Cumberbach - that's like the same right?
    Close enough for half points.
    ~Dustin B. AboC

    "Laugh, or you will go crazy."

  6. #6
    Eyes eastward... Uilleann's Avatar
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    All that DANGEROUS SATANIC BLUE LIGHT probably makes all Benedicts appear the same anyway. ;)

  7. #7
    Master OptiBoarder
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    at least you didnt divide by 0

  8. #8
    Eyes eastward... Uilleann's Avatar
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    I've been on edge all day - but so far, no call from the Po Po that all that frightening blue light vaporized him where he stood on the sidewalk!

  9. #9
    What's up? drk's Avatar
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    I'll bet that guy will never, ever get a good night's sleep again.

  10. #10
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    Brian, I don't think what you did constitutes murder. Your customer insisted on the blue lenses, that would be closer to Assisted Suicide. Who knows, you just might have a career change and become Utah's answer to Dr Kevorkian. Does Utah still offer the firing squad as an option or would they just sit you down in Ole Sparky, if they consider AS a death penalty offense.
    I didn't attend the funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying I approved of it. Mark Twain

  11. #11
    Eyes eastward... Uilleann's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by drk View Post
    I'll bet that guy will never, ever get a good night's sleep again.
    Doc, you may be right! So if I haven't completely killed him, and he'll never sleep...have I created the world's first real life zombie?!

    Quote Originally Posted by Paul Smith LDO View Post
    Brian, I don't think what you did constitutes murder. Your customer insisted on the blue lenses, that would be closer to Assisted Suicide. Who knows, you just might have a career change and become Utah's answer to Dr Kevorkian. Does Utah still offer the firing squad as an option or would they just sit you down in Ole Sparky, if they consider AS a death penalty offense.
    Utah is very progressive in the way we kill our patients with blue glasses, as well as our methods of capital punishment. Both the chair and firing squad (just brought back in the past few years again, because the wild west is apparently alive and well!) are both options...along with the sleepy juice shot into the arms. Though, I'm a bit unsure how my devious and deadly blue lenses fit in the legal framework of the prison system. ;)

  12. #12
    Master OptiBoarder OptiBoard Silver Supporter ak47's Avatar
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    Groovy. Out of sight!

    Quote Originally Posted by Uilleann View Post
    I'm fairly certain after dispensing these little beauties, that all the blue light will sear into his brain, riding that pervasive government carrier wave, cause both retinas to spontaneously burst into flame, and quite possibly induce scurvy and/or syphilis! That is all, of course, in addition to the obvious shifting of the earth's axis melting the ice caps and causing global devastation, the imminent random asteroid impacts, and the fifteen or so black holes now orbiting towards the solar system to consume us all.

    Sorry guys. But he really wanted BLUE lenses! So dats what he gots!

    Click image for larger version. 

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  13. #13
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    This made my day...this am was rough. As I was walking down the hall to get to optical, the stench was sooo bad. Like rotten garlic mixed with garbage. It was so bad I literal dry heaved right there in the hallway. Thank God that patient didn't need glasses! Reading this post made me chuckle instead of heave. Thanks!

  14. #14
    Rising Star Cat-Eyes's Avatar
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    my fellow opticians...this year ....make sure to vote yes on PROP 567894 the "no blue lens act". Blue lenses have resulted in one possible death.... that is one more than last year... up 100 % in violent blue light deaths from last year...remember crizal's newest fanciest no glare doesn't kill people (unless applied to poly tisk tisk)...but blue tints do!!! #alleyesmatter
    "One should either be a work of art or wear a work of art" - Oscar Wilde

  15. #15
    Master OptiBoarder
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    Quote Originally Posted by Cat-Eyes View Post
    #alleyesmatter
    I need that on a T shirt. BAHAHAHAHAHA

  16. #16
    Eyes eastward... Uilleann's Avatar
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    I think we need to build a wall - against ALL BLUE LIGHT entering our eyes. It will be YUUUGE - that I can tell you!

  17. #17
    Master OptiBoarder
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    Quote Originally Posted by Uilleann View Post
    I think we need to build a wall - against ALL BLUE LIGHT entering our eyes. It will be YUUUGE - that I can tell you!
    Who's going to pay for that wall? Mexico???

  18. #18
    looking up the answers smallworld's Avatar
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    Just slap a coat of Hoya Recharge on those and all will be fine!
    What is reality but a concept unique to each of us? Can anything be classed as real when our perceptions differ greatly on so many things? Just because we see something a particular way does not make it so.

  19. #19
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    I've seen the Blue Man Group several times when in Vegas, I wonder if their show constitutes "Blue Light Acts of Terrorism" and what about those nasty Smurfs.
    I didn't attend the funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying I approved of it. Mark Twain

  20. #20
    What's up? drk's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by mervinek View Post
    Who's going to pay for that wall? Mexico???
    No...make Essilor do it!

  21. #21
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    Best. Thread. Ever.

  22. #22
    My Brain Hurts jpways's Avatar
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    As long as your patient doesn't end up list this you'll be fine
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    (oompa loompa doopity do...)

  23. #23
    looking up the answers smallworld's Avatar
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    Or you could end up like this....
    What is reality but a concept unique to each of us? Can anything be classed as real when our perceptions differ greatly on so many things? Just because we see something a particular way does not make it so.

  24. #24
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    Quote Originally Posted by smallworld View Post


    or you could end up like this....
    dead man walking
    I didn't attend the funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying I approved of it. Mark Twain

  25. #25
    looking up the answers smallworld's Avatar
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    http://www.dailymail.co.uk/tvshowbiz...d-glasses.html

    Johnny Depp wears blue tinted glasses because he's "nearly blind in one eye" and very nearsighted in another.

    Somebody better talk to that man......
    Last edited by smallworld; 07-29-2016 at 01:30 PM. Reason: add more
    What is reality but a concept unique to each of us? Can anything be classed as real when our perceptions differ greatly on so many things? Just because we see something a particular way does not make it so.

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