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Thread: Most Batsh*t Crazy Thing You've Heard a Patient Say?

  1. #76
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    Had a patient last week who really liked my eye make up and asked lots of questions about the products and tools that I use. Nice, right? Who doesn't love a compliment. I was surprised today when she came in with a bag of makeup and started to pull it out on the diepensing table. She wanted me to give her a makeup tutorial because "You help people with their eyes, don't you?"

  2. #77
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    Quote Originally Posted by Blunder Woman View Post
    Had a patient last week who really liked my eye make up and asked lots of questions about the products and tools that I use. Nice, right? Who doesn't love a compliment. I was surprised today when she came in with a bag of makeup and started to pull it out on the diepensing table. She wanted me to give her a makeup tutorial because "You help people with their eyes, don't you?"
    I'm jealous, in all the years that I have doing this, not one of my patients has brought in a bag full of cosmetic products and asked for my assistance with color and application. Still waiting, with lip stick and rouge in hand.
    I didn't attend the funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying I approved of it. Mark Twain

  3. #78
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    Quote Originally Posted by COMEINPEACE View Post
    WE also had to invest in magical pliers and other various tools in addition to a magic shelf
    you cannot believe what a difference they make!
    Not always magical... This happened to a colleague. A woman entered the store with a pair of glasses in urgent need of adjustment. She hadn't bought them there, and the optician told her that there was a risk that they could break, and that it would be better if she went back to the original store due to warranties and all. The woman told the optician that if he couldn't help her, she would do it herself and asked for the stand holding the pliers. She took a pair of pliers without looking too closely at them and applied them to the temple. *snip!* Turned out she had picked the side cutting pliers... She slunk out without any further comment.

  4. #79
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    About two years ago a pt. came in and asked if we could buff out the scratches in his glasses. I explained to him that we could not. He demanded that there had to be a way. A couple of weeks later he called back telling us he had gotten the scratches out of his glasses by rubbing toothpaste all over them. Haven't seen or heard from him since.

  5. #80
    looking up the answers smallworld's Avatar
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    Long ago I had a patient who's son's sunglasses had a slight red hue/ dark grey tint. She came back complaining the "red" in his eyes was making him Satanic.

    Once a man started digging through our Lion's club donation box, put a pair on, and came over to me and asked if he could keep them because he needed a pair and miracle of miracles-this pair was his exact prescription. I tried logic, than just let him keep them.

  6. #81
    O.D. Almost Retired
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    Then there's the chiropractor who had cured all his patients' vision, and his own vision by some strange "no touch" incantations. He looked over 50 to me so I handed him a reading card and asked if he could read the middle row, about 20/40. He said "Of course not, it's too small!"

    I handed him a pair of readers and said "How about now?" He replied "Of course, you made the print larger!".

    I calmly told him "You need glasses, and just about all of your patients your age do too. The power of suggestion only goes so far."

    He got this strange look, turned around and never came back.

  7. #82
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    Quote Originally Posted by buckeyefan View Post
    About two years ago a pt. came in and asked if we could buff out the scratches in his glasses. I explained to him that we could not. He demanded that there had to be a way. A couple of weeks later he called back telling us he had gotten the scratches out of his glasses by rubbing toothpaste all over them. Haven't seen or heard from him since.
    I had brake fluid mark up the instrument display on my motorcycle. After rubbbing vigoursly with tooth paste for a few minutes the cloudy marks were no longer visible. It would probably work on old head lights as well. I imagine on cr-39 it could remove superficial scratches but leave some distortion.

  8. #83
    Master OptiBoarder CCGREEN's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by ex-optician View Post
    I had brake fluid mark up the instrument display on my motorcycle. After rubbbing vigoursly with tooth paste for a few minutes the cloudy marks were no longer visible. It would probably work on old head lights as well. I imagine on cr-39 it could remove superficial scratches but leave some distortion.
    Key word there, "superficial".... Shoot I have even used lemon pledge furniture polish on cr-39 to remove those real light cleaning scratches.

  9. #84
    Master OptiBoarder kat's Avatar
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    Years ago, I had a client that wanted to see like Chickens see. Put her in a full spectrum lens and she was as happy as her chickens.
    I came, I saw, I left

  10. #85
    Master OptiBoarder OptiBoard Silver Supporter rdcoach5's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by buckeyefan View Post
    About two years ago a pt. came in and asked if we could buff out the scratches in his glasses. I explained to him that we could not. He demanded that there had to be a way. A couple of weeks later he called back telling us he had gotten the scratches out of his glasses by rubbing toothpaste all over them. Haven't seen or heard from him since.

    I regularly use Boston cleaner or similar polish on scratches to smooth them out. toothpaste is a mild abrasive and probably works the same. You shouldn't try to polish very much or you start taking off the Rx, scratch cotes and etc.

  11. #86
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    So I just had a patient come in today that told me she is very unhappy with the glasses she got in July. She is angry that the finish is wearing off (banana republic frame). I told her they were under warranty and we would order her a new frame. Then she told me that she's dropped them on the tile floor several times and the finish chipped so she keeps painting them with enamel (that you use for models?) and the enamel does not stay on. She was mad that the enamel does not stay on the frame and didn't think a new frame was a good idea because this one didn't hold up very well. Good Grief!

  12. #87
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    Quote Originally Posted by mervinek View Post
    So I just had a patient come in today that told me she is very unhappy with the glasses she got in July. She is angry that the finish is wearing off (banana republic frame). I told her they were under warranty and we would order her a new frame. Then she told me that she's dropped them on the tile floor several times and the finish chipped so she keeps painting them with enamel (that you use for models?) and the enamel does not stay on. She was mad that the enamel does not stay on the frame and didn't think a new frame was a good idea because this one didn't hold up very well. Good Grief!
    Tell her that she should experience what she would receive from an online supplier.
    Last edited by Lab Insight; 03-02-2018 at 06:27 PM.

  13. #88
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    We had a patient with the same complaint but the frame was out of warranty. She told us her son knew how to paint and brought it back with a terrible purple spray paint job wanting to update the lenses in them.
    Last edited by Alex Camblor; 03-03-2018 at 01:07 AM.

  14. #89
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    I have a patient that buys a 6 month supply of contacts and wears them for 2 years and wonders why he gets really nasty infections. One time he came in and I swear his eye was so swollen it looked liked it was bulging out of his eye socket, he looked at us and said he waited three weeks for it to go away before coming in. He also mentioned that he is quite sure that he can wear his lens this long and that we as an optical practice simply try to scam him by proclaiming that he needs to get a fitting yearly and or order contacts after the recommended usage wear time is up.
    Erik Zuniga, ABOC.

  15. #90
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    I had a patient bring in his own Snellen Chart when he picked up his glasses... and then tell me it had to be 10 feet away.

  16. #91
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    Regarding to the story in the OP, shouldn't you report to the child protection organization so the kid will be under proper protection? Isn't the behavior of the mum is kind of child abuse that needs some intervene?

  17. #92
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    I had a lady come in a pick up her new glasses, she went to the bank right after then went home. She came back immediately and told me she had asked the teller how much money was in her account and she wrote it down. When she went home, there was a truck parked in front of her house that had the exact same numbers on it. She was convinced I had put a microchip in her lenses and I needed to remove it! Once I realized I wasn't going to be able to make her believe I had not, I agreed to send them in. Yes I put them in a tray and called her a week later and everything was perfect! A couple of years later when she got new glasses again, she advised me NOT to put that chip back in because I could get into a lot of trouble.

  18. #93
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    Oh my... had an outside patient come in yesterday. She took 2 hours (second time she came in to look) to select a pair of glasses. Finally made her decision and I made a copy of her Rx and began to write down the order (we are in the process of a new computer system so orders are hand written for now). Apparently she did not like the mono Pd measurement I got and insisted that it was wrong. She had me re-measure her 3 times (got same thing each time) and in the end insisted that I order with the measurements that she wanted. During all this, she kept taking the copy of the rx that I made and I kept telling her that it was my copy. We ended up having her sign a waver stating that if she wanted to use measurements different from what our office measures, all warranties/remakes on the glasses are void. She signs it and then asks what would happen if the rx needs changed. Told her it was her cost because she signed the waver. After all that she told me that it was not a pleasant experience. Asked her if she would like to speak to the office manager and if she was sure she still wanted to place the order. She said yes she wanted to place the order but did not want to speak to the office manager. After she left, I realized she took the copy I made of the rx. I really regret not telling her that we were unable to help her and that she should have going elsewhere. (She had told me that she's been to 6 different offices already to look at glasses). As a general rule, I have always done my best to help people, no matter how rude they are. I have never told anyone to leave. I really need to do that. There are just some situations that no matter what you do, people are going to treat you poorly and be rude.
    Last edited by mervinek; 01-11-2019 at 09:51 AM. Reason: additional information

  19. #94
    Master OptiBoarder OptiBoard Gold Supporter Judy Canty's Avatar
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    This was your first clue...(She had told me that she's been to 6 different offices already to look at glasses).

  20. #95
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    Yes. That is true. I ordered stock lenses and ordered the frame (so they can be returned) and am going to wait to process her payment and her insurance until next week. Told her they will take a week to make so I have time in case she cancels. I sort of hope she does.

  21. #96
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    While working at Lenscrafters (1 hour service) I had to come out of the lab to let a Pt know we needed to rework his lenses because they didn't come out right. He said "Oh, it's an hour or it's free right?" so we all started laughing. He was dead serious. No, sir, this isn't dominos...

  22. #97
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    I have a patient who has been coming in every few weeks with his frames bent completely out of alignment and the eyewires bent. He swears up and down that he has never sat on them or fallen asleep in them and the frames just do this on their own. He's convinced that it's just a flawed frame design.

  23. #98
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    ahhhhhhhhh...the magic shelf...whatever would we do without it!.....:)

  24. #99
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    About a month ago a patient came in said one of her horses stepped on her glasses. I adjusted them she was happy. Then Today she came back.She stated that she put her glasses in her case and when she took them out this morning the temples were bent down . I adjusted them and handed them back to her . Just then her husband came in and said are they straight ? Then he says , you know it would help if you would stop stepping on them . The patient gave her husband a nasty look and left . Everyone treats their glasses like gold ,always in the case and never wipes them dry !

  25. #100
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    Guy gets out of his very nice luxury Cadillac that has a "I earned a Purple Heart" license plate on it. He's probably in his late 70's, using a cane to walk. Comes in and shows me a pair of glasses that have obviously been chewed on by a medium to large sized dog, judging by the teeth marks in the lenses. He says to me "Darn dog chewed me glasses. I know that probably isn't covered by the warranty. What do I need to do to get a new pair?" Sir, just for being honest with me about what happened to them, I do believe those lenses are covered under the scratch warranty.

    Lady comes in, probably mid 50's, lots of flashy jewelry, probably 15 rings on 8 fingers, and a visible cloud of perfume. Gives me the remains of a pair of glasses that were probably chewed on by a large dog, or possibly a bear. "Ah don't know what could have happened. I put them in the case in my nightstand drawer last night, and when I woke up this morning they were just like this! You can just make me a new pair under warranty can't cha?" First lets get a new frame for you. By the way, how old is your dog? "Oh he's just going on 6 months old now.... .... .... Now how did you know I had a dog?" Because that's what happened to these glasses. Nice of your dog to put them back in their case in your nightstand when he was done with them. No, this sort of damage isn't covered by any warranty, a new pair will be a full price.
    There are rules. Knowing those are easy. There are exceptions to the rules. Knowing those are easy. Knowing when to use them is slightly less easy. There are exceptions to the exceptions. Knowing those is a little more tricky, and know when to use those is even more so. Our industry is FULL of all of the above.

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