Ew! Ew! Ew! Ew! Ew!

[MikeAurelius]

This thread is really testing my gag reflex.

[becc971]

after i read this thread this morning ... had a guy come in with nose cheese to spare, two rounds in the ultrasonic cleaner and elbow grease only got them to "disgusting". couldnt even properly wash the lenses because gunk kept coming out of the bevel *shudder* not only that, they were about a million years old, and made on a 10 BC ... for some reason haha ... he's going to like anything better than those!!

[eyes4u]

Wow!!! Got to love that public we deal with!! I had a similar pair of glasses come across my path a while back. They were covered with green gook.....looked like chewed up gum over the temples ,nosepads,etc.......... So I decided I'd do the right thing and clean them for this poor man. After I had cleaned them to they were sparkling(as much as they could) I informed the man that the metal was worn down and rough. He got so upset that I cleaned his glasses because the "gunk" kept his face from breaking out where the metal touched him and the "gunk" kept his head from turning green!!! So from then on I just clean the lenses and hand them back to the patient and then go and disinfect my hands!!

[AngeHamm]

Please remind me to never read this thread again.

[Mick]

I just about tossed my cookies on the counter. EW!

Isn't tossing cookies a whole different subject?

[Uncle Fester]

Wow!!! Got to love that public we deal with!! I had a similar pair of glasses come across my path a while back. They were covered with green gook.....looked like chewed up gum over the temples ,nosepads,etc.......... So I decided I'd do the right thing and clean them for this poor man. After I had cleaned them to they were sparkling(as much as they could) I informed the man that the metal was worn down and rough. He got so upset that I cleaned his glasses because the "gunk" kept his face from breaking out where the metal touched him and the "gunk" kept his head from turning green!!! So from then on I just clean the lenses and hand them back to the patient and then go and disinfect my hands!!

Go to a Radio Shack and pick up some assorted small sized lengths of tubular shrink wrap. Slip them over the temples and heat to shrink. I'll bet he'll love you for it. A thicker pair of silicone nose pads should keep the bridge from touching.

[Dave Metzger]

Back in the 80's I had a very nice elderly patient that would come in for adjustments. Before she would give you her glasses she would insist on cleaning them herself. She would stick out her 176 year old tongue and lick them like a lolly pop and wipe them with her scarf. Needless to say, nobody wanted to help her in fact, if any of the opticians saw her coming in they would head straight for the breakroom...

But one of my favorites was around the same time. This guy comes in to replace a missing nose pad. One of my new hires got him. She brings his glasses in the back to work on them... " Oh my God these glasses are filthy!" And she proceeds to take them apart and clean them with a brush, the whole time say things like, "Eww" and several more " My God"s and " You would think he cleaned his toilet with these.." Turns out, she wasn't far from wrong. He was a sewer worker and said his glasses constantly fell off into the "muck". When he told her that I thought she was going to pass out. I run into this optician occasionally and never fail to remind her of him. She still doesn't think it was funny. ( Boy, I do!)

I spent 30 minutes cleaning a guy's yuck and when I returned them he accused me of switching out his frame without his permission. It was very difficult that day to put the toothpaste back in the tube

[JohnMcGowan]

A woman walks in to the shop after being seen in the 2nd floor indigent clinic here at work. Her glasses are all mangled and crooked on her face and just plain full of eyefunk and she would like them adjusted. I said I'd be happy to do that for her. She pulls off her glasses and I take them to the back and adjust them. As Im walking back out to give them to her I notice she is scratching her head ( and adjusting her very bad fitting wig !!). I hand her glasses back to her and as she lifts up that wig slightly to make sure the temples are behind her ears, a gaggle of cockroaches comes running out and crawls down her back !!
Pardon me, but does anyone have any Grey Poupon? Its lunchtime now, lets eat!!

Ive got several more good horror stories if you're interested?

[mervinek]

There goes the cupcake I had for lunch!

[Pogu]

You're thinking of salads.

[vcom]

Some patients must honestly think this little guy comes and visits in the middle of the night to clean their glasses. Otherwise, I just can't explain how gross and dirty they let them get. I've named him, Larry. Larry The Lens Cleaning Fairy.

[Now I See]

OK, I'm just reading this....and yes, it's still just as disgusting as the day the thread started! I was going to eat lunch, but after this, I think I'll wait a little while. Gotta try to get these images out of my head.

[becc971]

A woman walks in to the shop after being seen in the 2nd floor indigent clinic here at work. Her glasses are all mangled and crooked on her face and just plain full of eyefunk and she would like them adjusted. I said I'd be happy to do that for her. She pulls off her glasses and I take them to the back and adjust them. As Im walking back out to give them to her I notice she is scratching her head ( and adjusting her very bad fitting wig !!). I hand her glasses back to her and as she lifts up that wig slightly to make sure the temples are behind her ears, a gaggle of cockroaches comes running out and crawls down her back !!
Pardon me, but does anyone have any Grey Poupon? Its lunchtime now, lets eat!!

Ive got several more good horror stories if you're interested?

more stories!!! this kid loves a good gross out

[eyes4u]

OMG!!! Are you serious??!!! Really!! That has got to be the most disgusting thing I've ever heard! I probably would"ve screamed!!

[eyes4u]

Luv it!!

[becc971]

revitalizing this thread for this one:

had a pair of glasses i needed to put in the ultrasonic cleaner today that had small hairs stuck all through them ... nose hairs or eyebrow hairs, your call ... *shudder*

[cowboytelemark]

This thread is awesome. That is all.

[Uncle Fester]

more stories!!! this kid loves a good gross out

Stolen story from an old coworker when we worked in the big city...

Middle age rumpled man comes in wearing a very strong minus that touched his cheeks. Informs the optician that there's something wrong with the glasses and when he reaches up and takes them off a long string of mucus and ocular secretions stretches and droops as he attempts to hand them to the recoiling optician.

"Excuse me but before I touch them you need to see a doctor about what's discharging from your eye."

[sharpstick777]

Yikes! Did they bring their own rock in, or did they wait to get home to crawl back underneath it?

During a discussion about what type of material her husbands lenses were, the wife picks up the frame, a very old and GREEN metal rotting gross thing, and LICKS the lens.

I'm expecting to have a conclusion to her argument that they were in fact glass, as opposed to the plastic I knew they were, but she simply sat there and was quiet.

I on the other hand tried not to show them the weight watcher's approved breakfast I had enjoyed earlier in the day.

Grossest. Thing. Ever.

[sharpstick777]

Wow, it sounds like you stepped onto a set of a horror movie.

A woman walks in to the shop after being seen in the 2nd floor indigent clinic here at work. Her glasses are all mangled and crooked on her face and just plain full of eyefunk and she would like them adjusted. I said I'd be happy to do that for her. She pulls off her glasses and I take them to the back and adjust them. As Im walking back out to give them to her I notice she is scratching her head ( and adjusting her very bad fitting wig !!). I hand her glasses back to her and as she lifts up that wig slightly to make sure the temples are behind her ears, a gaggle of cockroaches comes running out and crawls down her back !!
Pardon me, but does anyone have any Grey Poupon? Its lunchtime now, lets eat!!

Ive got several more good horror stories if you're interested?

[Jarhead Daddy]

Squirrel licking good!

http://www.nbc.com/saturday-night-li...d-open/n12808/

[optimensch]

a woman comes in the other day complaining of red itchy left eye. She wears focus dailies occasionally, but hasnt worn in a while.
i evert her eyelid to have a peak, and stuck way up in the cul de sac i see a piece of lens. I remove a torn contact, and she remembers that she thought a piece might have been in there a while.
On further inspection, I find a SECOND folded and intact lens buried even deeper in there. that is 1.75 contact lenses stuck in an eye for months and months.

EW.

[becc971]

Stolen story from an old coworker when we worked in the big city...

Middle age rumpled man comes in wearing a very strong minus that touched his cheeks. Informs the optician that there's something wrong with the glasses and when he reaches up and takes them off a long string of mucus and ocular secretions stretches and droops as he attempts to hand them to the recoiling optician.

"Excuse me but before I touch them you need to see a doctor about what's discharging from your eye."

dude. *shudder* always good for entertainment mr. fester

we had a woman who had chronic conjunctivitis, that was convinced worms were coming out of her eye. blahhhhhhhhhhrrrggggg

[sharpstick777]

a woman comes in the other day complaining of red itchy left eye. She wears focus dailies occasionally, but hasnt worn in a while.
i evert her eyelid to have a peak, and stuck way up in the cul de sac i see a piece of lens. I remove a torn contact, and she remembers that she thought a piece might have been in there a while.
On further inspection, I find a SECOND folded and intact lens buried even deeper in there. that is 1.75 contact lenses stuck in an eye for months and months.

EW.

Too bad you can't irrigate with "smart fluid" all over her head.

[carriew]

Several years ago I had a patient who came in after their glasses fell into a cow pie, insteaded of hoseing down the glasses they decided to let them dry for about a week. People never cease to amaze me with their rational thinking skills.