What Is The Stupidest Question You Have Been Asked

**Bok** · 12-09-2013, 07:50 PM

Originally Posted by Manual

Just got a phone call...

"I lost my glasses in the snow, is that covered under warranty?"

I get that all the time except its usually along the lines of, I just stood on my glasses case and it broke can you replace it for free?? Oh and by the way the glasses were inside... they can't be very good quality because they broke too... So I think you should replace them with better quality ones.

My reply, huh??!?!?

**mrmac** · 12-11-2013, 01:08 PM

I am glad to see that the post I started 6 years ago is still going.

**Java99** · 12-11-2013, 01:09 PM

Originally Posted by Bok

I get that all the time except its usually along the lines of, I just stood on my glasses case and it broke can you replace it for free?? Oh and by the way the glasses were inside... they can't be very good quality because they broke too... So I think you should replace them with better quality ones.

My reply, huh??!?!?

We get a fair amount of "My husband plowed his glasses under, is that covered?"

**CrystalOoley** · 12-11-2013, 03:31 PM

Maybe not the dumbest question, but one of my favorite:

pt walks in with broken glasses, " I need a screw"

lol, so many times when I want to answer back and say we aren't a optometry that offers happy endings. lol.

**CrystalOoley** · 12-11-2013, 04:26 PM

oh, and one that I get everyday when I answer the phones:

"When is the soonest available appointment I can get in?"

and I give them the date of the soonest appointment

and then they reply

"you don't have anything sooner?"

(yeah, since you said that, a sooner date magically showed up on our schedule. ugh.)

**edKENdance** · 12-11-2013, 04:30 PM

Originally Posted by CrystalOoley

oh, and one that I get everyday when I answer the phones:

"When is the soonest available appointment I can get in?"

and I give them the date of the soonest appointment

and then they reply

"you don't have anything sooner?"

(yeah, since you said that, a sooner date magically showed up on our schedule. ugh.)

Or when would you like to come in and they say anytime is good but you spend the next 10 freaking minutes discovering that anytime is not good at all!

**becc971** · 12-11-2013, 04:39 PM

Originally Posted by edKENdance

Or when would you like to come in and they say anytime is good but you spend the next 10 freaking minutes discovering that anytime is not good at all!

when i get patietns like that i give them two options and then say "clearly what i have isn't good for you, so i really need you to just narrow down a time that will work for you so i can find you the next available appointment"

that little dance gets me like no other ... or "well i don't have my schedule with me so i'll have to call you back" for real dude? why did you call in the first place?????

**Logan** · 12-12-2013, 12:10 AM

I had someone ask me today, "Are these glasses bisexual?"

**mervinek** · 12-12-2013, 10:21 AM

Originally Posted by Logan

I had someone ask me today, "Are these glasses bisexual?"

I've had that before. Then I got the "Where are the unisex glasses?" Turns out it was a guy in the middle of a sex change who wanted something that would work for before and after. Interesting.

**Joyley** · 12-12-2013, 11:32 AM

We have Optomap; takes a picture of the inside of the eye. I get this patient lined up but she's a fast blinker. So I tell her I'll snap the photo on the count of three.

So I say: "One, two- "click-flash."

She says "I thought you said you'd count to three?" I said I was trying to surprise her, catch her off guard by snapping it on two. (I figured she was anticipating the click-flash)

But alas, still get a picture of her eyelid. Okay, plan B: I give the patient the control/clicker; sometimes they do better if they can take the photo themselves.

So I'm getting her lined up again, telling her that as soon as she's in position .....

"CLICK-SNAP"

I'm like: uhhh, I didn't have you lined up.

She says, seriously: Oh, I'm sorry, I was trying to surprise myself.

**opty4062** · 12-15-2013, 02:30 PM

Originally Posted by Joyley

We have Optomap; takes a picture of the inside of the eye. I get this patient lined up but she's a fast blinker. So I tell her I'll snap the photo on the count of three.

So I say: "One, two- "click-flash."

She says "I thought you said you'd count to three?" I said I was trying to surprise her, catch her off guard by snapping it on two. (I figured she was anticipating the click-flash)

But alas, still get a picture of her eyelid. Okay, plan B: I give the patient the control/clicker; sometimes they do better if they can take the photo themselves.

So I'm getting her lined up again, telling her that as soon as she's in position .....

"CLICK-SNAP"

I'm like: uhhh, I didn't have you lined up.

She says, seriously: Oh, I'm sorry, I was trying to surprise myself.

THIS just made my day. I love how after explaining clearly that they have to not blink for just a few seconds, they continue to blink then blame me or the machine. It's the same people who want to sit back and ask a question or talk during a visual field test. 8)

**doctor_who10** · 12-16-2013, 07:29 PM

I get a lot of people who come in and say something like "I'm missing a screw, can you help me?" My response is always to say, without missing a beat "I'm sorry, but I'm afraid you're screwed."

**D. Weeks** · 12-17-2013, 01:31 AM

walk-in customer came in and asked:

customer: I have that spectacular insurance, do you take that?
me: do you mean Spectera?
customer: yeah, that one!
me: oh law'd

**AngeHamm** · 12-17-2013, 11:37 AM

I love when this thread gets resurrected. One of these days I'm going to go back and re-read it from the top.

**doctor_who10** · 12-17-2013, 12:28 PM

This is the thread that will never die.

**Slim** · 12-17-2013, 12:37 PM

OUR 3PM APPT called this morning... "yeah, I woke up and my eye is really red, I need to reschedule....."

Wow, AMAZING logic at work right there... cancel the dr appt. because your sick....

**Joyley** · 12-17-2013, 08:02 PM

Sometimes we get women in who CAN'T pick out a frame without their husband. I had a lady in once and we picked out a pair that was very flattering, fit great and was under her budget. But she has to have hubby see them before she purchases them.

He comes in with her the next night. I kid you not: he proceeds to have her try on frames he is picking out- ALL OF THEM MEN'S FRAMES!!!

What's with that!!!

**becc971** · 12-18-2013, 09:52 AM

Originally Posted by Joyley

Sometimes we get women in who CAN'T pick out a frame without their husband. I had a lady in once and we picked out a pair that was very flattering, fit great and was under her budget. But she has to have hubby see them before she purchases them.

He comes in with her the next night. I kid you not: he proceeds to have her try on frames he is picking out- ALL OF THEM MEN'S FRAMES!!!

What's with that!!!

i feel the same way when they say "oh i want to come back with someone to help me" ... umm that's what i'm here for chief. then they bring their friends, and all they do is screw around for an hour trying on the most ridiculous stuff then accuse us of not having what she's looking for. maybe leave it to the professionals mm'kay?

**NCspecs** · 12-19-2013, 09:21 AM

So apparently some of our patients really struggle with how the Optomap works. I guess they don't understand what we are trying to accomplish or they simply aren't listening.

One man who was too busy gabbing to listen to the tech who was instructing him, turned around. leaned back, and started to whack the back of his head up against the eye piece. The Tech, startled, cried, "Eyes Mr. Smith! not brains. We are checking eyes today!"

Last week another patient sat down in front of the machine and tried to cover the entire eye piece with her mouth!!!! WTH???? I wish I was making this up!

**Joyley** · 12-19-2013, 10:26 AM

Originally Posted by Chris Ryser

Just wondering how and why a thread that is ridiculing the customers of a profession, can become one of the most successful ones on a public forum and just go on and on.

Probably because its REAL life stories. You just can't make this stuff up!

**AngeHamm** · 12-20-2013, 11:52 AM

I just had a patient come in to pick up her new glasses. Took off her old glasses to try on the new one and had a "Whoa!" response to her new 2.50 diopters of cylinder. I explained that, with that much astigmatism, it might be a bit of an adjustment to get used to the new RX. That's when I went to put her old glasses in her new case and saw that they were off-the-rack glasses with demo lenses in them.

I've seen people who don't need glasses wear them for fashion, but never before have I seen someone with a critical need for prescription eyewear walking around with non-prescription glasses.

**doctor_who10** · 12-20-2013, 12:54 PM

Originally Posted by AngeHamm

I just had a patient come in to pick up her new glasses. Took off her old glasses to try on the new one and had a "Whoa!" response to her new 2.50 diopters of cylinder. I explained that, with that much astigmatism, it might be a bit of an adjustment to get used to the new RX. That's when I went to put her old glasses in her new case and saw that they were off-the-rack glasses with demo lenses in them.

I've seen people who don't need glasses wear them for fashion, but never before have I seen someone with a critical need for prescription eyewear walking around with non-prescription glasses.

That's actually frightening. Did she come back saying her new glasses were too strong?

**AngeHamm** · 12-20-2013, 01:51 PM

Originally Posted by doctor_who10

That's actually frightening. Did she come back saying her new glasses were too strong?

Nope. Just walked out happy with her new lenses. I remain baffled.

**doctor_who10** · 12-20-2013, 02:03 PM

Thankfully, this one didn't happen to me, but a customer came in a while back and demanded that we return her glasses onto a different credit card from the one that had been used to purchase them. When she was told that we wouldn't do that (because credit card fraud is slightly illegal) she began to yell at the manager. Sometimes I wish I knew what went through these peoples' heads.

**Joyley** · 12-26-2013, 07:44 PM

This really isn't a question patient asked but...

Patient came in and needed her glasses adjusted. I proceeded to adjust them and she starts getting all excited. "Be careful, you're going to break them! Are you sure you know what you are doing??" she says loud enough for everyone in the dispensary to hear.

I sigh, stare at her for a minute, then say "Mom, I've been doing this a long, long time now. It's okay. They'll be fine."

(....yes, it really was my mother. You should have seen the other opticians trying not to laugh...)