The Blonde and the Sailor
One night on his way to his ship a sailor comes across a beautiful young lady, sitting on the dock crying her eyes out. He stops, asks her what the matter is, and she tearfully exclaims that she just wants to end her miserable life; she lost her job, her boyfriend dumped her, and her ex husband cleaned out her bank account. He comforts her with a hug and suggests that she accompany him on his ship which is sailing to Hawaii. All she must do is stay below deck in his quarters and he would supply her with food and drink for the entire trip in exchange for having a warm body to lay next to each night. She thinks about this proposition for a moment, and then gratefully accepts his offer, thinking that a new start in a beautiful tropical locale would be better than ending it all.
So for two weeks he supplies her with three meals each day, wine, chocolate, and each night he has the pleasure of getting into a warm bed with a beautiful girl waiting for him.
Then, the captain of the ship happens to be below deck one day checking out a noise one of the other crew members heard and happens across this lady in the crewman's quarters. She explains her situation and how she came to be on the ship and asks how much longer the trip to Hawaii would take as she'd be getting off the ship there and starting her new life.
The captain replies, " Well I dunno how long it would take to sail to Hawaii but this is the Queen of Surrey ferry which runs between Vancouver Island and the mainland, and we'll be in Vancouver in an hour!"