Jokes about eyes are awesome. The cornea, the better...
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Science is a way of trying not to fool yourself. - Richard P. Feynman
Experience is the hardest teacher. She gives the test before the lesson.
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OMG, that's really a bad joke!...Here's some more!Originally posted by Robert Martellaro View Post
Why did the cross eyed teacher quit her job? She couldn't control her pupils.
Why did the phone where glasses? It had lost all it's contacts.
What did the right eye say to the left eye? "Between you and me, there's something that smells.."
How many eye doctors does it take to change a light bulb? "1 or 2?"
What's it called when you poke your eye putting on safety glasses? Eye-rony.
What do you call a fish with no eyes? "Fishually impaired".Comment
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Good groaners.Originally posted by optical24/7 View Post
Daughter: I want a Barbie and a GI Joe for my birthday.
Mother: Doesn't Barbie come with Ken?
Daughter: No, she comes with GI Joe. She fakes it with Ken.Science is a way of trying not to fool yourself. - Richard P. Feynman
Experience is the hardest teacher. She gives the test before the lesson.
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Did you hear about the Amish woman who was shunned? Too Mennonite.
OptiBoard Administrator
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OptiBoard has been proudly serving the Eyecare Community since 1995.Comment
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Man goes to a job fair in Toronto, at the optical booth he explores the possibility of becoming an optician. The man asks the regulator manning the booth, “What job security is there if I become an Optician ? The regulator replies: “ To sell glasses to people in Ontario you have to be an Optician and licensed”Comment
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A Villain Who Unintentionally Always Does Helpful Things
Science is a way of trying not to fool yourself. - Richard P. Feynman
Experience is the hardest teacher. She gives the test before the lesson.
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Science is a way of trying not to fool yourself. - Richard P. Feynman
Experience is the hardest teacher. She gives the test before the lesson.
Comment
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Two ducks are walking down the road. One of the ducks says "quack". The other duck says: "OMG, I was going to say the same thing!"Science is a way of trying not to fool yourself. - Richard P. Feynman
Experience is the hardest teacher. She gives the test before the lesson.
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hahahahaha the duck is intelligent he ensure that bartender does not have any nails.Originally posted by jcasowder View PostComment
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That's why I love HONDA rather than any other brand. hahahahahahaOriginally posted by Robert Martellaro View PostRetro interior trim option now available for the 2019 Honda Passport.
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Why is Santa so Jolly?
He knows where all of the naughty girls live.Science is a way of trying not to fool yourself. - Richard P. Feynman
Experience is the hardest teacher. She gives the test before the lesson.
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What's invisible and smells like carrots?
Bunny farts.Science is a way of trying not to fool yourself. - Richard P. Feynman
Experience is the hardest teacher. She gives the test before the lesson.
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Finally!! A name for the aromatic effect shortly after having my daily Vitameatavegamin smoothie! Thanks!Originally posted by Robert Martellaro View PostComment
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We received a few extras when we saw the movie at Oriental Theater. No bunny farts here, let me tell you!Originally posted by optical24/7 View Post
RobertAttached FilesScience is a way of trying not to fool yourself. - Richard P. Feynman
Experience is the hardest teacher. She gives the test before the lesson.
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Who is Jack Schitt?
For some time many of us have wondered just who is Jack Schitt? We find ourselves at a loss when someone says, 'You don't know Jack Schitt!'
Well, thanks to genealogy efforts, you can now respond in an intellectual way.
Jack Schitt is the only son of Awe Schitt. Awe Schitt was married to O. Schitt, the fertilizer magnate, and owner of Needeep N. Schitt, Inc. They had one son, Jack. In turn, Jack
Schitt married Noe Schitt. The deeply religious couple produced six children: Holie Schitt, Giva Schitt, Fulla Schitt, Bull Schitt, and the twins Deep Schitt and Dip Schitt. Against her parents' objections, Deep Schitt married Dumb Schitt, a high school dropout.
After being married 15 years, Jack and Noe Schitt divorced. Noe Schitt later married Ted Sherlock, and because her kids were living with them, she wanted to keep her previous name. She was then known as Noe Schitt-Sherlock.
Meanwhile, Dip Schitt married Loda Schitt, and they produced a son with a rather nervous disposition who was nick-named Chicken Schitt. Two of the other six children, Fulla Schitt and Giva Schitt, were inseparable throughout childhood and subsequently married the Happens brothers in a dual
ceremony. The wedding announcement in the newspaper announced the Schitt-Happens nuptials.
The Schitt-Happens children were Dawg, Byrd, and Horse. Bull Schitt, the prodigal son, left home to tour the world. He recently returned from Italy with his new Italian bride, Pisa Schitt. Now when someone says, 'You don't know Jack Schitt,' you can correct them.
Sincerely,
Crock O. SchittComment
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