bullying

[Deepak]

members, you must have experienced bullying inb your work place,share you experiences how you handle it.
Lastly,how do you handle bullying on optiboard:drop: just joking.
see ya next week.

[John R]

Deepak said:
Lastly,how do you handle bullying on optiboard

DARRIS

[hcjilson]

MORE DARRIS!!!!!!

They don't call him Dr. Death for nothing!

hj

[rsandr]

You cant beat bullying in the workplace,
they call themselves ascertive, management love them, workmates call them but suck up to them for an easy life, if you stick up for yourself you appear to be the one with the problem.

Get out and leave them all to it i say,

Rick

[chm2023]

My experience has been the bigger they are, the harder they fall. You have to get right back into their face sometime. I know it's tiresome and probably makes you feel ridiculous but most bullies count on people being too embarassed or too well bred to give it back. Usually they will back down. Not saying you have to be crude or boorish, but hold your ground and don't be afraid to raise your voice--and don't let him/her back you down out of your personal space. Good luck!!

[rsandr]

My experience has been the bigger they are, the harder they fall. You have to get right back into their face sometime. I know it's tiresome and probably makes you feel ridiculous but most bullies count on people being too embarassed or too well bred to give it back. Usually they will back down. Not saying you have to be crude or boorish, but hold your ground and don't be afraid to raise your voice--and don't let him/her back you down out of your personal space. Good luck!!

In modern times it can be a bit more sophisticated than just physical bullying,
people get on by constantly selling themselves as great, while dogging everyone else, manipulating people, if they promote themselves well enough soon people will start to beleive their hype.
Whereas a hard working, reliable, honest team member lives in the shade if they wont blow their own trumpet.
People have bells and whistles too.
Rick

[chip anderson]

Bust them right in the nose, they are all cowards and only bully those that are more cowardly than they.

Chip

[John R]

rsandr said:
You cant beat bullying in the workplace,
they call themselves ascertive, management love them, workmates call them but suck up to them for an easy life, if you stick up for yourself you appear to be the one with the problem.

Get out and leave them all to it i say,

Rick

Spot on there Rick...:)

Just a shame some people cant see this for real as we would then end up with less jerks in management.

[Darris Chambless]

I read your posts yesterday but had to take off to go slaughter a few birds for the season (not many flying in range though) and didn't have time to respond. I almost got weepy when I read what you'd both written ;) Thanks guys.

As to "bullying" in the workplace you can't "get out and leave them all to it" because where would you go? I say that meaning if you know of a place where bullying doesn't exist at all why aren't you already there? There is a big difference between a person being motivated, assertive or compitent and being a bully so don't confuse them. If they are the first three learn from them but if they are the latter simply keep your eyes and ears open and you will be ahead of the game. Listen long enough and your bound to either find their weaknesses or be able to create one for them. It's called fighting fire with fire and it is not difficult to do as long as you're patient.

I've dealt with many pompous, overly confident (with no reason to be) people and have had no problems that could not be solved in an amicable manner. I don't recommend this but I called my former boss out into the parking lot of the business so that we could handle some issues man to man (if you get my drift). BUT this was neither wise nor do I recommend it to anyone, but in my case it was necessary because of some of the things going on in that office that could have affected me and several other employees in a very (emphasis on 'very')) negative way and he would not listen to reason. In fact when reason was present he made things worse on purpose for everyone. This was an extreme case though. I did not get fired but my boss did spend the next years and a half trying to get me to quit (he wouldn't fire me because I could have filed a law suit against and won and he knew it, and I would have.)

Take things in stride, do your job to the best of your ability and be aware of everything going on around you. If they are physically bullying you file an assault charge against them; that will either make them back off or come after you and if they come after you you have the right to defend yourself. That puts you in the drivers seat.

Take care,

Darris "The anti-bully ;)" C.

[optispares]

Bust them right in the nose, they are all cowards and only bully those that are more cowardly than they.

if only it were so simple.
how come these people always seem to be in some lower to middle management position? and use their power to prey on the less able and weaker members of staff.
i wish i had a pound for every time i have had to stop myself from busting one in the mouth.

when i was over in Ireland at the Sola plant I noticed that the Irish had anti bullying laws and all members of staff were encouraged to report any bullying to there manager or to go higher up if this failed.

[Jedi]

*disclaimer: this is NOT a generalization about ALL women, just an observation I have made from my own experiences.*

I find that women who have worked their way to the top or to a position of authority are guilty of bullying women in positions
under them. While the men under them rarely have any conflicts.

[rsandr]

I read your posts yesterday but had to take off to go slaughter a few birds for the season (not many flying in range though) and didn't have time to respond. I almost got weepy when I read what you'd both written Thanks guys.

I bow to your superior bravado.

As to "bullying" in the workplace you can't "get out and leave them all to it" because where would you go? I say that meaning if you know of a place where bullying doesn't exist at all why aren't you already there?

I am, i am now sucessfully self employed.
But i think everyone should remember that if they are good at their job they shouldnt be made to feel that their employer is doing them a favour by giving them a job, maybe they are doing their employer a favour by working there.

There is a big difference between a person being motivated, assertive or compitent and being a bully so don't confuse them

My personal experiences dont involve physical bullying, i am quite a big lad, but in most workplaces it seems that a bitter sweet blend of brown nosing and muck slinging prove the best way to get on.

Listen long enough and your bound to either find their weaknesses or be able to create one for them. It's called fighting fire with fire and it is not difficult to do as long as you're patient.

Frankly mate i couldnt be assed, there should be no need for a battle strategy at work.
Work takes up too much of a persons time to get sucked into such things.
Maybe one day all the do-ers of the world will have found something that suits them, and all the blinkered managers and the talkers of the world will sink down the pan together.
If you are not happy at work keep looking elsewhere and be safe in the knowledge that when you find something better they will be missing you more than you are they.

Hope this reply isnt too soppy for you Mr Death.

Rick

[rsandr]

Just a shame some people cant see this for real as we would then end up with less jerks in management.

It just isnt going to happen John.
Management have to be jerks, its how they are trained at management meetings, 'bottom line'.'bums on seats' etc (i blame McDonalds).
Nobody seems to want to work these days anyway, i dont know if this is as a result of the management problem (like the chicken and the egg i suppose).
I just hope things get better, as it stands in this country it is difficult for small companies to compete and large companies are managed to death, we are all doomed.
Still when manufacturing falls on its face there are many call centres recruiting.....
Anyway soapbox away, goodnight.
Rick

[Darris Chambless]

I was addressing Deepak but using a couple of things you'd said.

I too am self employed and enjoy it, but if one is working for another a battle plan; although it shouldn't be necessary, is necessary and Deepak is asking how to deal with that. Not everyone is like us and can just run out and open a shop and until I got to that point I had to learn how to cope.

"But i think everyone should remember that if they are good at their job they shouldnt be made to feel that their employer is doing them a favour by giving them a job,..."

I agree 100% but the fact of the matter is that this happens more often than not.

"...maybe they are doing their employer a favour by working there."

Absolutely! And now if we can just get the employers to see it that way we won't have these problems :)

I too never experienced any physical bullying as I too am quite a big lad, but if it does occur call in the authorities first then one can defend ones self if it becomes necessary. I'm not suggesting "baiting" anyone into this situation (as far as anyone knows ;) only that sometimes these things can be necessary from time to time.

Take care and sorry for the confusion,

Darris C.

PS Are you a bird hunter by chance?

[cats]

Hey Everyone!!
Just so you all know, there are places out there where management aren't jerks and staff is really appreciated. Being management myself, I sure hope I have my finger on the pulse of my staff, and I truly believe I make every one of them feel good that they came to work every day, cause I really appreciate them and all they do. However, I also have an incredible staff, so it goes both ways :)

Just had to pop managements 2 cents wirth in there....lol

[rsandr]

Darris,

PS Are you a bird hunter by chance?

Youre joking arent you,
after we brits have finished being bullied in the workplace, we head out and start being bullied in the lifeplace.
Pretty much every peice if this isle is owned by the overprivileged, and anything less than mundane requires licensing, membership, huge expense and is usually limited to organised gatherings.

Cats,

I make every one of them feel good that they came to work every day, cause I really appreciate them and all they do.

Thats the stuff dreams are made of.

Stay cool.
Rick

[John R]

rsandr said:
It just isnt going to happen John.
Management have to be jerks, its how they are trained at management meetings, 'bottom line'.'bums on seats' etc (i blame McDonalds).
Rick

If only ours had been trained..
Even a chip has more of a idea of how to treat staff....
If it run a McDonalds it would be shut in less than a day for running out of burger buns...:hammer:
Dont agree that they have to be jerks.
Hard nosed yea as it helps to please those above them. :drop:

[Darris Chambless]

rsandr said:
Darris,

Youre joking arent you,
after we brits have finished being bullied in the workplace, we head out and start being bullied in the lifeplace.
Pretty much every peice if this isle is owned by the overprivileged, and anything less than mundane requires licensing, membership, huge expense and is usually limited to organised gatherings.

Rick

Well then Rick...

Save up some of that money you're making and come on over here. I'll put a shotgun in your hand and we'll go do a little hunting. Plenty of land around to do this on too.

Private property is private property; however, there is plenty of public land and in some cases the property owners will let you hunt their land if you do the right thing by asking them if it's alright first ;)

Take care,

Darris C.

[rsandr]

Save up some of that money you're making and come on over here. I'll put a shotgun in your hand and we'll go do a little hunting. Plenty of land around to do this on too.

As i read this my girlfriend reminds me of scenes from Deliverance, ouch!
If i ever feel like my outfit can manage without me i may take you up on that offer athough i have to admit to having never shot anything, i may well wimp out.
Regards,
Rick

[Darris Chambless]

rsandr said:
As i read this my girlfriend reminds me of scenes from Deliverance, ouch!
If i ever feel like my outfit can manage without me i may take you up on that offer athough i have to admit to having never shot anything, i may well wimp out.
Regards,
Rick

Um, I'm from Texas not the backwoods of Arkansas. I have all my teeth, am not retarded and don't carve my initials in my retarded twin brothers feet, but do play a banjo on occasion :) Granted we may not be as sophisticated as the hunters in Britain but our goal is to hunt not to look good and shoot something for bragging rights only ;) We typically wear camoflage and look more like trees than people, although heavily armed trees :)

If you should ever decide to come over you're always welcome. This is a "no wimp zone" however, and by the time you leave you will have fired just about every conceivable calibur or guage known to man. As to animals, I'm partial to birds simply because there is more sport to bird hunting than to larger game hunting (and yes, we actually eat what we shoot. Cooked of course not raw out in the field ;) You would enjoy it I can assure you.

Take care,

Darris C.

PS, I'm going out again this weekend. I'll let you know how I fair. The first day of hunting was a bit slim, but that's why they call it "hunting" not "killing" ;)

[Joann Raytar]

Darris Chambless said:
... As to animals, I'm partial to birds simply because there is more sport to bird hunting than to larger game hunting (and yes, we actually eat what we shoot.

Why would you need to go large game hunting? Don't you folks have cattle the size of Cadillacs down there?

[chip anderson]

Actually where Darris is it's one of the most barren places you ever saw. My good friend Vernon Lamb tells me you need one section of land to rase one head of really scrawny cattle if you don't artificially feed an water. Of course it's so dry they don't need towels.

Chip

[Darris Chambless]

Chip has it just about right except we have had some rain and there is quite a bit of greenery presently, but then we are in a desert after all and it is dry the majority of the time.

Jo,

One of the beef cattle breeds that are popular around here are called Limousine and they are very large and in charge. If you've ever been to a circus or carnival side show that has "The worlds largest cow!" and it is actually the biggest bovine you've ever seen, it's probably just a plain old, everyday Limousine that they picked up somewhere.

As to the actual hunting of big game and why? Well, there are many exotics in this area and they've run amok so the herds have to be thinned or they run the risk of starving to death during prolonged dry whether. Around here we have more ecological reasons for most game hunting than other areas because of the lack of water which leads to a lack of vegetation.

Take care,

Darris C.

[Deepak]

first impression DARRIS was some american action movie staer,later postings by members made it clear that is optibopard actio n hero.
Glad to know you,that is all.+++++++++my next door neighbour is playing loud hi-fi's,seems to be bullying peaceful teneants,great distrbance in my studies- going for action now.

[paw]

Bullying is a word I associate with schoolyard behavior. In the adult world I would call it harrassment. There are 2 ways to handle it: get the upper hand over the bully (call the cops or in a work situation, speak to his boss), or if that's not possible, leave the sphere of influence of the bully. If that means quit your job or move to a new house, so be it. There is no reasoning with a bully. If you could, then he wouldn't be a bully, just an a** hole.