View Poll Results: Should parents Spank?

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  • Spank

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  • Do not Spank

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Thread: Spare the rod?

  1. #26
    sub specie aeternitatis Pete Hanlin's Avatar
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    ...one thing for sure is that kids instinctively play parents against each other...
    Happily (and humorously) enough, my daughter hasn't yet managed to master this little trick! She'll ask one of us for something (usually her mommy first, cause she's a softer touch than daddy- if that's possible), get a "no" and then ask the other one immediately. Thing is, she'll do this when we're in the SAME ROOM!

    Its sad, really... I want to take her aside and explain the way the whole scheme really works (cause I was awesome at this when I was a kid).

    First, you go to dad and say "If it's okay with Mom, can I go to Jimmy's house?" Dad almost always says something to the effect of "Huh? Oh, well if its okay with your mother, sure- why not." (Its best to ask your question while he's busy watching football or something equally mind-numbing). Thus armed, you go to mom and say "Dad says its okay for me to go to Jimmy's if its okay with you." Mom, figuring Dad has actually given the request some thought (it always amazed me that someone married to the man didn't know him any better than that!), says something like "Well okay then, just be sure to call if you're staying for dinner... yada yada yada" (you don't usually hear the last part- which usually contains some sort of ridiculous restriction like wearing a coat and hat because its 34 degrees out or some such drivel- because you are already heading for your bike).
    ;)
    Anyway, for now I'm content to laugh each time little Sara completely botches the old "Mom v. Dad" play. To make matters worse, I'll ask her what her mommy just said- and she'll FIB! That's right, she has to know I just heard exactly what mommy said, but somehow she must figure I'll believe her if she tells me the exact opposite- simply hillarious!

    I've watched Bernie Mac on occasion... what a hoot! :D
    Pete Hanlin, ABOM
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  2. #27
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    One thing children need to learn early on, is : WHEN ONE PARENT HAS SAID NO! IT'S NO! ASKING THE OTHER PARENT AFTER RECEIVING A NO FROM ONE PARENT SHOULD RESULT IN A SPANKING.

    My appologies for those liberals amoung you who feel this is a thing that should be reasoned (no spanking) out with the child.

    Chip:bbg:

  3. #28
    Master OptiBoarder ziggy's Avatar
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    I'll get in hot water over this but here it goes,, FEAR,,it's what makes us decent beings. the trouble with most kids is they fear nothing,,not GOD, not laws, not even mom and dad. So you have little jerks, spank your kids,please.
    Paul:cheers:

  4. #29
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    I work in a pediatric ophthalmologists office and some of the kids are so cute, but some of them I would like to take a belt to the parents. Some of these kids rule the household and life must really be tough at home.:finger:

  5. #30
    ATO Member OPTIDONN's Avatar
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    i love my daughter but there are times that she neads a 'pankin... there is a differance between spankin and beating!

  6. #31
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    Quote Originally Posted by Jo
    I don't have children but I think there are certain situations where a spanking is appropriate. "Time Out" is only affective if a childs' personality will equate it to a consequence. If the child doesn't mind sitting still for X amount of time, what good will it do if the child has done something very bad or hurtful.
    AMEN TO THAT!!! two different kids and two different personalities, took me a little while to realize the difference but dang it are you right!!

  7. #32
    Just An Optician jediron1's Avatar
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    [QUOTE=John R]Over here the 10 and under are out of touch as far as the law goes....
    DO you think that the parents should be held responsible instead because i sure as hell do....

    One: what does this have to do with the question?

    Two:
    My answer, yes, within reason. It should be explained why the punishment is being meeted out and then afterwards there should be reconcilation. UNDER NO CIRCUMSTANCES SHOULD THE PUNISHMENT BE DONE IN ANGER! Just my 2 cents!

  8. #33
    Just An Optician jediron1's Avatar
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    Pete Hanlin]Interesting opinions all...

    BTW, hitting an adult is a crime because of the scenario in which that action usually takes place (uncontrolled rage). Spanking a child should never be done while upset, and is a totally different excersize- the two are apples and oranges.[/QUOTE]

    Pete you hit the nail on the head! As I said before "PUNISHMENT WITH CHILDREN SHOULD NEVER BE DONE IN ANGER"

  9. #34
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    Just to make the situation more difficult.

    Those psychologists who will actually recommend (a lot more would like to but are afraid of legal and peer pressure) spanking, make another point: "Punishment should be administered as near as possible to the time of offence. Those who wait 'til they get home or until the spouse is there to administer punishment are messing up in a big way.

    Chip

  10. #35
    One eye sees, the other feels OptiBoard Silver Supporter
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    Quote Originally Posted by John Tickner
    If I hit an adult, that is assault. Hitting a child is arguably a greater crime.
    Right. If you can't out smart a six year old you shouldn't have kids. On the other hand, I know a few teeners (teenagers)who could use a good belt in the mouth.
    Science is a way of trying not to fool yourself. - Richard P. Feynman

    Experience is the hardest teacher. She gives the test before the lesson.



  11. #36
    Just An Optician jediron1's Avatar
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    John Tickner
    If I hit an adult, that is assault.

    Hitting a child is arguably a greater crime.[/QUOTE]

    Yes hitting a child like an adult would be a greater crime, but that was not the question and that would not be the result if you applied the question and punishment correctly. You took a statement and took it to the enth degree. You jumped from assault on an adult to what it could be if done to a child, how did you arrive at that rubbish? Re-read what Chip said and you might get a better
    understanding where we are coming from.:hammer:

  12. #37
    Just An Optician jediron1's Avatar
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    Right. If you can't out smart a six year old you shouldn't have kids. On the other hand, I know a few teeners (teenagers)who could use a good belt in the mouth.
    Then we have:

    If I hit an adult, that is assault. Hitting a child is arguably a greater crime.
    I don't know which one is more moronic! One who say's that he knows a few teeners "who could use a good belt in the mouth." or the other one that tries to
    compare adult assault with hitting a child. Unbelievable!:hammer:
    Last edited by Pete Hanlin; 04-13-2005 at 10:19 PM.

  13. #38
    Just An Optician jediron1's Avatar
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    Quote:
    Right. If you can't out smart a six year old you shouldn't have kids. On the other hand, I know a few teeners (teenagers)who could use a good belt in the mouth.


    Then we have:



    Quote:
    If I hit an adult, that is assault. Hitting a child is arguably a greater crime.


    I don't know which one is more moronic! One who say's that he knows a few teeners "who could use a good belt in the mouth." or the other one that tries to
    compare adult assault with hitting a child. Unbelievable!:hammer:



    Well I will add one more moronic one. The police handcuffed a five year old, I believe for disorderly conduct. Unbelievable but look at the statements that
    were made before by our fellow BOARDERS and maybe this is not so unbelievable. I quess she just needed a "good belt in the mouth":hammer:

  14. #39
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    What else could the people involved with that five year old girl in Florida do, she is tossing the teachers desk, the vice principal intervenes, the little girl is taken to the office where she starts tearing papers off the wall, starts swinging at the vice principal. And remember during this whole time they are trying to talk to her and calm her down and they can not touch her accept to protect themselves.

  15. #40
    Optical Curmudgeon EyeManFla's Avatar
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    My 18 year old son actually had the b...s to tell me that he would have felt more loved if I had spanked him now and then.........

    So I picked him up out of his chair and threw him off the front porch.......

    Stupid is as stupid does.....:hammer:


    "When I get home I'm going to snack your Momma....No way you sprang from my loins"
    "Coimhéad fearg fhear na foighde"

  16. #41
    Cape Codger OptiBoard Gold Supporter hcjilson's Avatar
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    Were you watching the same tape I was watching??

    Quote Originally Posted by ken@foothills
    What else could the people involved with that five year old girl in Florida do, she is tossing the teachers desk, the vice principal intervenes, the little girl is taken to the office where she starts tearing papers off the wall, starts swinging at the vice principal. And remember during this whole time they are trying to talk to her and calm her down and they can not touch her accept to protect themselves.
    What you had was a hysterical 5 yr old. In my humble opinion as a 64 year old parent, what was needed to be done was to put the child in a room with no exit, preferably a cloak room (thats what my 5th grade teacher used to call the closet) and let her calm down using that universal cure....tincture of time. The absolute worst thing that could have been done was to pin her arms behind her back and cuff her. Had I been present I probably would have been guilty of assault of a police officer. Had I been there as the child's parent, it well could have been more serious than that.
    "Always laugh when you can. It is a cheap medicine"
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  17. #42
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    Jederon:
    You can only reason with people that are paying attention. Look up Hysteria (root: greek for woman). You cannot reason with a hysterical person unless you can get thier attention. Liberals have ruled out all conventional methods of getting such people's attention other than restraint and time (if and when this works). Surely you can remember some people that you knew in elementary school who would throw hysterical fits and no reasoning was possible during same.

    Chip

  18. #43
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    Quote Originally Posted by hcjilson
    What you had was a hysterical 5 yr old. In my humble opinion as a 64 year old parent, what was needed to be done was to put the child in a room with no exit, preferably a cloak room (thats what my 5th grade teacher used to call the closet) and let her calm down using that universal cure....tincture of time. The absolute worst thing that could have been done was to pin her arms behind her back and cuff her. Had I been present I probably would have been guilty of assault of a police officer. Had I been there as the child's parent, it well could have been more serious than that.
    I don't think a teacher can put a child into a closet, since this would be considered false imprisonment or corporal punishment.

  19. #44
    Just An Optician jediron1's Avatar
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    chip anderson
    Jederon:
    You can only reason with people that are paying attention. Look up Hysteria (root: greek for woman). You cannot reason with a hysterical person unless you can get thier attention. Liberals have ruled out all conventional methods of getting such people's attention other than restraint and time (if and when this works). Surely you can remember some people that you knew in elementary school who would throw hysterical fits and no reasoning was possible during same.

    Chip[/QUOTE]

    I think I understand what your saying, but waht's the point?

  20. #45
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    Jed:

    The point is that the police, or the educators would have been wasteing thier time trying reasoning. Surely you have been in the presence of a hysterical woman (one who's loved one has just died or something) and a good slap brought her back to the real world without being a "cruel" jesture.
    Otherwise one is forced with either waiting forever an hopeing the hysterical person comes out of it eventually on thier own (not always the best course of action if the individual is distructive or in danger of going into shock, or even needed in the real world.)
    With today's restraint against "violence" on the educators and the police and somewhat even on parents, the police did the right thing. Of course what was needed was a few good smacks across the cheek (any of the four).

    Chip

  21. #46
    Master OptiBoarder chm2023's Avatar
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    What I found very odd about this was that the police have cuffs that fit a 5 year old??? Being a child in Florida is rough business. Don't understand the specifics, but from the tape, the adult in the picture to be acting very confrontationally with the child, which any parent knows is a bad strategy with a wound up kid.

  22. #47
    Just An Optician jediron1's Avatar
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    Five-Year-Old is Laid to Rest
    by Rich Turner
    Published Jul 27, 2005



    Funeral services were held Wednesday for Arthur "AJ" Gibson Junior.

    Family and friends gathered at the Pentecostal Power of Deliverance Church to remember the five-year-old boy who died last week.



    His mother, Yolanda Williams, 24, is facing assault and child endangerment charges. Authorities say AJ's body had scars and showed signs of abuse for most of his life. From Rochester N.Y News paper.



    From what they said the 5 year boy also was put into hot water. I would take the cuffs over being scalded. His mother should get life!

  23. #48
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    Jederon: You flamming liberal. Slow death is far more suitable.

  24. #49
    Just An Optician jediron1's Avatar
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    chip anderson
    Jederon: You flamming liberal. Slow death is far more suitable.[/QUOTE]


    Sorry Chip I let my left side have a say and as always it leans left. I'll make sure
    to stay to the right the next time. :bbg:

  25. #50
    Bad address email on file Lynne's Avatar
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    Smilie

    To spank or not to spank? I grew up with them, and lived to tell the tale. However, my husband and I were not going to, just talk to the little darlings, and point out the error of their ways. However, the first time one of the boys sassed me, he got a whop from Daddy, which shocked the heck out of him, and I was never sassed again. After that we went back to the old time-out, take away toys etc, until we were told in a church parenting class that it doesn't hurt to apply the book to knowledge to the seat of learning.

    So, we talked to our then 11 yr old twin boys, and said that in future this is what you will receive for wilfull disobedience. Of course, they tried us out, twice, and that was that. We now have two wonderful, sane, polite, helpful, mature 29 yr olds, who were not traumatised by corporal punishment the twice they received it, on their behinds.

    So, yes, time-outs, removal from a situation, explanations, all have their place, but for wilfull disobedience, I believe a spanking, with foreknowledge that this is the result of certain behaviours in the future, and another "do you know why you are about to be spanked" before the event, works wonders! My folks never did that, just lashed out in anger, which is NOT the way to do it.

    :cheers:

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