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Thread: A sad day in OBX.

  1. #1
    Master OptiBoarder OptiBoard Silver Supporter
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    A sad day in OBX.

    My wife flew up to NY this past week to be with her ailing dad. The news this morning is not good, as his heart is only working at 15%, so they have contacted hospice to make the last hours/days as comfortable as possible. This man replaced my own dad who died when I was 19, and has been my "adult" father, you know, the guy who shows you how to fix everything in your new house, or gives advice on the lawnmower.

    My son just called, and he is having a very difficult time with this. He is an adult, but this is the first time he has had to go thru this process with someone so close. He is very close to his grandfather, and has been since birth.

    For me, all I can say is thanks Chuck, it's been a great time for 37 years, and I will miss you.

    Not trying to be a Debby downer here, just saying to enjoy that moment with the people that you love, today.

    mark

  2. #2
    The Man, The Myth, The Legend OptiBoard Gold Supporter Fezz's Avatar
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    My heart goes out to you and yours.

    Hang in there my friend.
    The Man, The Myth, The Legend,

    Fezz
    Rising from the ashes like the great Phoenix
    Who cares how time advances?
    I am drinking ALE today
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  3. #3
    Master OptiBoarder OptiBoard Silver Supporter Jubilee's Avatar
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    Your post brought a tear to my eye. I wish you and yours peace and understanding as you negotiate these hard times.
    "Some believe in destiny, and some believe in fate. But I believe that happiness is something we create."-Something More by Sugarland

  4. #4
    Master OptiBoarder Striderswife's Avatar
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    It sounds like he's leaving behind a fantastic legacy, of a truly great man who was loved. Barring those unexpected circumstances, we all must reach those days of sunset on our lives, and we can only pray that the end comes without pain or discomfort. For your grown son, never to have lost someone this close, what a blessing! Many of us have been to handfuls of funerals, which is sad. But it's fortunate that your son has not had to go through the grief process so many times like others.

    I nearly lost my grandmother last week, but she had a quite surprising turnaround and it looks like she's going to pull through. But we were all preparing for the news. My heart goes out to you now, knowing what you're going through, and praying for peace and comfort for your family.
    It's nice to be important, but it's more important to be nice.

  5. #5
    Rising Star OptiBoard Bronze Supporter
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    I am sorry you and your family are going through this difficult time. When hospice was called in for my 101 yr old grandmother I had no idea how I would survive not having her around. They gave my family a blue booklet, "Gone From My Sight" which broke it to me gently about Granny's last days/hours. With the help of hospice and prayers may you find comfort and peace. Ginny

  6. #6
    Forever Liz's Dad Steve Machol's Avatar
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    He sounds like a great guy Mark. I am very sorry to hear this.


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    Ophthalmic Optician OptiBoard Gold Supporter
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    Sorry to hear of it Mark. It's always difficult to say goodbye to a friend, and he sounds like he was the best of friends to you.
    Ophthalmic Optician, Society to Advance Opticianry


  8. #8
    Master OptiBoarder OptiBoard Silver Supporter optical24/7's Avatar
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    What John said. My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family.

  9. #9
    Master OptiBoarder OptiBoard Silver Supporter
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    Thanks all for the kind thoughts. Things have not really changed much since this morning, so we are all waiting for the inevitable. I will post an update when I know more for all my friends here.

  10. #10
    Always Learning OptiBoard Bronze Supporter
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    Quote Originally Posted by obxeyeguy View Post

    My son just called, and he is having a very difficult time with this.
    I'll pray that the keepers of the universe send healing and calming powers your way.
    Robert Martellaro
    Roberts Optical Ltd.
    Wauwatosa Wi.
    www.roberts-optical.com/
    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
    "An expert is a person who has made all the mistakes that can be made in a very narrow field."
    - Niels Bohr

  11. #11
    Master OptiBoarder
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    I know this is a difficult tme, and wish you and the family the best. You are in my prayers.

  12. #12
    Master OptiBoarder OptiBoard Silver Supporter
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    Update, as I just spoke with the bride. Prognosis is not good, heart functioning at about 15%, kidneys shutting down, possible brain damage due to lack of oxygen. Maybe only hours, as we have a dnr on him, so it's in someone else's hands right now.

  13. #13
    Master OptiBoarder OptiBoard Gold Supporter CuriousCat's Avatar
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    Mark, we went throught this long sad process with my Dad a couple of years ago. The pain is incredible, but it passes. Now, I feel his presence in so many ways and in odd moments, so I know he's always with me. You all are in my heart.
    Proud OptiBoarder since 1995!

  14. #14
    Happy Halloween k12311997's Avatar
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    my thoughts and prayers to you and your family.
    A F E L
    Always Forever and Even Longer.
    Unfortunately the words only meant something to me.

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    opti-tipster harry a saake's Avatar
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    prayers

    Quote Originally Posted by k12311997 View Post
    my thoughts and prayers to you and your family.
    mark, belinda and myself also wish to extend our deepest sympathies to you and the family

  16. #16
    Master OptiBoarder OptiBoard Silver Supporter
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    Thanks again for all your kind thoughts. Just waiting now for the inevitable to happen. A reality? Yes, but it sure doesn't make it any easier.

  17. #17
    Master OptiBoarder OptiBoard Silver Supporter
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    Well. I received that phone call that he passed quietly about midnight, with my brother in law with him. I have not talked with my wife yet to see how she is handling this, she doesn't handle things like this well.

    Thanks again for all the kind thoughts and pm's I received, they are really appreciated.

    mark

  18. #18
    The Man, The Myth, The Legend OptiBoard Gold Supporter Fezz's Avatar
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    Thanks for the update.

    Hang in there.
    The Man, The Myth, The Legend,

    Fezz
    Rising from the ashes like the great Phoenix
    Who cares how time advances?
    I am drinking ALE today
    -Edgar Allen Poe-

  19. #19
    Master OptiBoarder NCspecs's Avatar
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    I'm so, so sorry for your loss. It's never a good day to lose a loved one. I hope you find comfort with your family and close friends during this difficult time.
    "Strictly speaking, there are no enlightened beings; only enlightened activity." -Shunryu Suzuki

  20. #20
    Master OptiBoarder OptiBoard Silver Supporter optical24/7's Avatar
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    Even when we know these things will happen, it doesn't make it any easier. My sincerest condolences Mark.

  21. #21
    Master OptiBoarder OptiBoard Silver Supporter optilady1's Avatar
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    I'm very sorry for your loss, and pray you and your family find some peace through this difficult time.
    annie

  22. #22
    Compulsive Truthteller OptiBoard Gold Supporter Uncle Fester's Avatar
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    To learn to love unconditionally is why we exist. I do not look at death as a finality but as a transition.

    My condolences.

  23. #23
    Optimentor OptiBoard Gold Supporter Diane's Avatar
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    Mark,

    I am so sorry for your loss. I'll put your family on my prayer list. The comfort that you can get now, is that he was a great man, and became your "Dad". What a legacy, and what a legacy you can pass to your own son.

    Diane
    Anything worth doing is worth doing well.

  24. #24
    Master OptiBoarder OptiBoard Silver Supporter
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    Just back from my NY trip for the memorial service, and everything worked out fine. I got to see my wife for the first time in 10 days, my Mother for the first time in 3 or 4 years, yeah I know, but it's cold and snowy up there, and it didn't disappoint. The weather is really gloomy compared to here on the beach, and I sure don't miss it. A very hectic 3 days, but higher powers dictate timelines, not us.

    Goodbye Chuck, I will miss you.

  25. #25
    Working on the MBA OptiBoard Gold Supporter Wes's Avatar
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    I share your sorrows and mixed feelings my friend. I lost a family member, celebrated a birthday with one daughter and my other daughter had her first child all in this week. I spent time with family I hadn't seen in years, all while exhausted and stressed over the multi-overnight SC-NC-VA-WV-VA-NC-SC drive totaling 1400+ miles. Had to come back to SC by this morning to attend the best CE seminar I've ever attended, given by none other than our own Laurie Pierce.
    Here's to our lost family members.
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