Craziest things you've heard from patients...

[chip anderson]

Against:

I actually have my patient's do this to see if things are snug enough.
What I hate is when they take thier hands to pull them and say they are too loose. I can't fit them tight enough that they can't be moved with the hand.
Most patients are quite satisfied when they are told the bend and shake test is sufficent.

Chip

[MarcE]

if she "serviced" him.

Without missing a beat (or asking the doctor) the girl told her no she didn't think so.

She didn't even ask the doctor? Maybe the "lady" would be able to see now if she had just inquired.

[THE MEB]

just maybe the lady would have called him doc because she liked the way he operated.

[va_optikal]

How bout ,
My nose pads stink. I said,' Um ... they do" ? He said, ' Yes ! its horrible , I can't wear them , ( slamming glasses on my desk) ... they make me gag. :bbg: It took all I had not to laugh.
( They were silicone )
This man was near 80 years old and was serious as all get out. Needless to say I put a set of hard pads on for him and he was satisified.
I had never heard this one before. I did smell a slight rubber smell, but it really was nothing, but to him it was. ;)

[Against the Rule]

Against:
Most patients are quite satisfied when they are told the bend and shake test is sufficent.
Chip

Chip, this is one of the few times I have to disagree. I wear glasses when I give my eyes a break from contacts, and I like them comfortable--not so tight I can wear them making love or bare-knuckle boxing. I guess it's just personal preference, but there are glasses with straight temples that will obviously move if you bend over and shake your head, and yet they've always sold well and we don't get a lot of "my glasses fell off!" complaints.

[wolfman]

Here's one I see all the time, especially with the elderly patients...They'll put on the glasses, bend over and shake head vigorously, and then say they're too loose because they slipped when they did that.

I tell them two things when they do that depending on my mood. The first is "Then don't do that" and the second is "Do you do that kind of thing a lot because if not I wouldn't worry about it" That will usually make them realize how unrealistic they are being.

[SarahMP584]

I had a new one last week. A lady was buying poly with AR, and her geezer husband says, "Why are you putting coating on poly?" So I explained AR and he says in an accusatory tone... "but polycarbonate is ALREADY polarized! why do you need anti glare!" Again I calmly explained polarized lenses...but he still wanted to argue with me so I finally just said "Ok!" and rang them up.

[Crazy-bout-Optics]

" I want Scratch Proof lenses"

:cheers:

[THE MEB]

"I want those frames with the lifetime guarantee"

[DragonLensmanWV]

You have any indestructable frames?

[bob_f_aboc]

I'm coming into this one a little late, but I have always had kids up to about 9 or 10 years old do the bend and shake test. I have seen too many parents come in with destroyed glasses becasue they fell off on the playground or soccer field or whatever. I also do a pre-adjustment for first time kids and tell mom and dad to bring them back in a week to finalize the adjustment. If the glasses feel too tight at first, most kids won't wear them. Fitting them a little loose serves as a transition to a proper adjustment.

[chip anderson]

Have you noticed that some frames have nose pad strutts so strong that you can barely adjust them (I assume to keep them in position in patient use) and others have them so weak you can move them with the slightest pressure. Give such a frame to a child and the nose pads will be smushed flat against the back side of the lenses before they get out of the parking lot.

Chip

[bob_f_aboc]

Have you noticed that some frames have nose pad strutts so strong that you can barely adjust them (I assume to keep them in position in patient use) and others have them so weak you can move them with the slightest pressure. Give such a frame to a child and the nose pads will be smushed flat against the back side of the lenses before they get out of the parking lot.

Chip

I have finally gotten most of the weak pad arms out of my stock for kids. I still have about 4 per day that come in for adjustment and the kids hate having the glasses on their nose where they belong.

Of course, I have my frequent flyers that are in if the wind blows too hard. Yet others that come in only every 2 years to have their glasses scraped clean.

I guess its a happy balance in the end.

[THE MEB]

Chip, are the nose pad strutts right next to the bridge shock absorbers? just curious

[Nettie]

I've heard a lot of crazy things from ignorant patients in my rather short 7-year career as an Optician but today, one patient took home the 1st place trophy! Patient came in asking about exam prices, glasses, etc. Then asks one of the new staff members if the Dr. will charge her full price for the exam even though he only has to check one of her eyes?? She is blind in one eye! I was eating lunch in my office and starting laughing so hard I almost choked on my food. To oblige the lady, the poor girl that was helping her came to ask me and I told her to tell the lady "sorry", there was no discount for having only one eye! Have you ever heard stuff like this before?? :hammer:

I did this to my ob/gyn. I was having my tubes tied about 11 years ago. An emergency surgery about 4 years earlier had left me with only one functioning fallopian tube. As I was being wheeled into surgery I jokingly asked the doc if my surgery would be half price since there was only one tube to tie. She was not amused but the OR staff was cracking up. Some people have no sense of humor.:bbg:

[jaross]

A guy I work with once had a customer come in and tell him that she had accidentally left her glasses upside down on the nightstand the night before and all of the medicine had come out.

[maggiferous]

Going along with that, I had a woman come in once with her glasses just COVERED in scratches...she'd left them in the pocket of her sweater or something and put them through the washer and the dryer, and told me that she just couldn't see, the machine must have washed the medicine out of them!

We very calmly told her that she had a warranty and that we would repair them for her, no problem. She replied, "That's okay, I'll be fine with my old ones til then-I see better with those anyway, the doctor told me the medicine was stronger in my old ones" It was a fight to not laugh til she got out the door.:)

[Ineed Chocolate]

I once heard of an optician whose customer was complaining about the mark on her shirt...she insisted the guy pay for her cleaning bill for the shirt, as the "medicine" had leaked out of the glasses and had left a stain. :hammer:

[specs4you]

:bbg:

I had a lady bring in a frame to be soldered, she left them with me for a couple of hours and then returned to pick them up. She went off on me when I put them on her, she ranted and raved about them not being hers. She said she had trifocals,(this pair had bifocals). I proceeded to explain to her that these were her glasses...on and on it went.
Finally I said, you know what mame, maybe these aren't your glasses, but they are in fact the ones you brought in for me to repair! Her husband looked at me like I was crazy, then he grabbed the glasses from her. He inspected them and announced that they were HIS old glasses.
That was 4-5 years ago, I haven't seen them since.

Another time a lady accused me of selling her used frames. She had family in the military and she knew that they were issued glasses. She claimed that the glasses that she got from me were used, because the owners named was stamped on the temple. His name was Colonel Gary Fade.
Well the frame was marked COL. GRAY FADE! I don't think she ever was convinced that that was the color of the frame, but, she left.

[Leighlee]

I had a woman come in to office and ask me if the doctor did eye exams here?? :drop: I wanted to say..."Well he is partial to nose exams but he will do an eye exam on occassion." REALLY??? Where do these people come from?

[chip anderson]

Leighlee:
They come from offices that don't examine (independent opticians. I get about a dozen people a week that either call or come in wanting an eye exam. Of course we have to ask if it's a prosthetic eye which we do examine.
If a patient comes in your office and the first thing he sees is an optical dispensary, he has no way of knowing if you have an in-house docotor.

Chip

[Jamelina]

This morning actually I had a patient come in wanting an adjustment. He gave me his glasses and asked why we always have to take them back to the "secret cave" to fix them. I explained that is where we keep all of our tools and parts (in the lab). It's easier to have them in one spot. Once I returned and had him put his glasses on he said "I swear you guys snort a line or something when you go back there." What do you say to that? I think that's the weirdest thing a patient has ever said to me.

[Ginster]

This morning actually I had a patient come in wanting an adjustment. He gave me his glasses and asked why we always have to take them back to the "secret cave" to fix them. I explained that is where we keep all of our tools and parts (in the lab). It's easier to have them in one spot. Once I returned and had him put his glasses on he said "I swear you guys snort a line or something when you go back there." What do you say to that? I think that's the weirdest thing a patient has ever said to me.

Seems like He's the one that had a few lines before coming into your office, You should have corrected him and said Sir' It's called the bat cave.:hammer::hammer:

:cheers::cheers:

[opt2012]

I once heard of an optician whose customer was complaining about the mark on her shirt...she insisted the guy pay for her cleaning bill for the shirt, as the "medicine" had leaked out of the glasses and had left a stain. :hammer:

That happened in my office. It was a few years back before I started working there. The whole "medicine" thing just amazes me. (you know who the optician was? Was his name Kevin?)

This guy comes in and says he needs some good sturdy frames. So we show him the titaniums. He says "These won't work. Titanium melts at 4000 degrees and I am a welder." Uh. Because we have frames made of some other type of metal that even the sun won't melt.

I also had a woman scream at me for 10 minutes about how her 5 year old son failed the vision exam at school and had to get glasses but she didn't want him to get an exam. Really? So I'm supposed to just look at him and know his Rx?

[MarcE]

"These won't work. Titanium melts at 4000 degrees and I am a welder."

Because skin melts at what?
Well don't sell him that AR because it's only rated to 2000 degrees:hammer:

Priceless!