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Thread: Craziest things you've heard from patients...

  1. #1
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    Craziest things you've heard from patients...

    I've heard a lot of crazy things from ignorant patients in my rather short 7-year career as an Optician but today, one patient took home the 1st place trophy! Patient came in asking about exam prices, glasses, etc. Then asks one of the new staff members if the Dr. will charge her full price for the exam even though he only has to check one of her eyes?? She is blind in one eye! I was eating lunch in my office and starting laughing so hard I almost choked on my food. To oblige the lady, the poor girl that was helping her came to ask me and I told her to tell the lady "sorry", there was no discount for having only one eye! Have you ever heard stuff like this before?? :hammer:

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    Good to see you here Wes.

    I had a man ask, "if I only need one lens replaced can I have a discount?" I said sure, it's half off a pair!! :hammer:
    Sosher

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    Sounds reasonable to me, I hope you charged her half price!

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    OptiBoard Apprentice Kornika's Avatar
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    A patient once told me, "When I close my eyes, I can't see."

    "... mediocre standards are never interchangeable with extraordinary possibilities." -J. Neal


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    Master OptiBoarder optigrrl's Avatar
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    Or, how about this one: When I *jiggling entire frame* do this, my nose pads make a sound! You need to replace these, they are defective!

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    Master OptiBoarder optical24/7's Avatar
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    There's time I thought I ran a psychiatric clinic rather than an optical clinic, but one of my favorites...


    I sold a guy a small zyl Armani frame and put green 3 plano's in it. (his request.) The guy calls me about 6 months later and tells me "Someone broke into my locked briefcase and exchanged my Armani's with fake ones."

    I asked him what was different. He said they looked the same (green lenses too), but "were not the same". Then he asked me if there was any warrenty for this! I told him loss or theft isn't covered but I'd love to look at these "fakes". He never came by....

  7. #7
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    through the course of about 10 years the OD I work for had this elderly female patient that would chew gum to get it wet and then wipe her corneas with it. She thought it was the only way she could get her "eyes clean." There was nothing the doc could say to discourage this bizarre behaviour.

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    Paper Shuffler GOS_Queen's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by optigrrl View Post
    Or, how about this one: When I *jiggling entire frame* do this, my nose pads make a sound! You need to replace these, they are defective!

    Oh! I hate that!
    "I just love the smell of Optidirt in the morning.

    Smells like------Victory." -- Uncle Fester :p


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    Quote Originally Posted by optigrrl View Post
    Or, how about this one: When I *jiggling entire frame* do this, my nose pads make a sound! You need to replace these, they are defective!
    That's an oddly common complaint for some reason. I always tell them this "they make a sound because they are new and clean(true). They'll stop after you gunk them up a bit". Shuts them up everytime.

    And then there's this also common but dumb complaint. "I don't want a frame with nosepads".

    Really? Why not?

    "They always turn green after a few years".

    Siiiigh. You do realize that they come off and we can replace them with CLEAN ones.

    "Oh".

    :hammer:

  10. #10
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    remember when we cleaned the nose cheese off with toothbrushes, before silicone pads? then they would really make that noise, because most of the posts were metal, causing metal on metal noise.

  11. #11
    Bad address email on file
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    had a Lady call me a Jack ### because I wouldn't give her a refund for a box of opened contact lenses she purchased the day before and wanted to return them so she could buy them cheaper on line.


    I also had a guy tell me after spending 20 minutes with him that he wasn't going to buy glasses from me because he was going to buy the exact same pair on line. :hammer:

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    lol

    Quote Originally Posted by optigrrl View Post
    Or, how about this one: When I *jiggling entire frame* do this, my nose pads make a sound! You need to replace these, they are defective!

    My favorite is when they do that and then complain that they're to loose. I love telling them that they should have a little up and down movement because otherwise that would mean that they've been stapled to their face! :D
    "Lack of planning on your part does not constitute an emergency on my part."

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    Quote Originally Posted by ajboon View Post
    I also had a guy tell me after spending 20 minutes with him that he wasn't going to buy glasses from me because he was going to buy the exact same pair on line. :hammer:

    At least you only spent 20 minutes. I had a guy come in look for a certain frame, which we did have, I probably spent a little under an hour talking optical with him, taking his measurments, and explaining his RX to him. When all was said & done, he balked at the price, which was around $300. He claimed he could get the same one online with his rx for only $33.00 (& that included his poly progressives, polished edges, & AR!!!) After asking me if I'd throw on polished edges for free, which I said no to, he asked me to give him his pd measurment & seg ht that I got in that frame for him, to which, again, I said no. He was furious, & said, "fine, I'll go home & measure myself in the mirror!". I can't wait to see how that works out for him. Part of me half hopes that he'll come in to talk to me when he can't see out of them! :p
    "Focusing isn't just an optical activity, it is also a mental one."-Bridget Riley

  14. #14
    opti-tipster harry a saake's Avatar
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    nose pads

    I dont know if most of you realize that so called nose pads( a relatively new name) are supouse to move, so that when the nose moves as it does constantly as you talk and eat, the pad will automatically adjust to the movement. Originally these pads were known as Grayton rocker pads, made by the grayton mfg. company , i believe in upstate rochester, N.Y., some of you older geezers here on the board may remember getting them in those boxes, and the pads were flesh colored and hard, and almost lasted forever. You might try telling your patients about the nose pads when you dispense and then it will not come back to haunt you.

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    I still have some of those pink nose pads,lol
    But I tell patients all the time that they are called movable adjustable nose pads, they are designed to give to keep the pressure off your nose. They usually act as if they buy it. Where I get it the most is when one pad moves and the other one doesn't and the patient wants both of them not to move. This is a good example though of the little annoyances that the patients have. Many won't tell you but will stay annoyed and maybe even purchase their eyewear someplace else next time, so I try to be as cognizant to their little problems and listen to their complaints and try to rectify them as best I can. It's painfull to think that a patient might be lost because of a small issue that wasn't either taken care of to their liking or explained where they understand the error of their ways in a kind and cuteous manner, of course.

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    We had a LOL come in a few years back for new lenses in her frame. When she came back to pick up the specs she insisted that we had stolen her old frames and replaced them with some cheap ones. We talked to her for a while but she insisted she was right and called the cops. The police show up and get some info from her and I. He then proceeds to ask her more about her glasses. She said they had a little scratch on the temple, so he goes to the back and scratches the temple. She then states that the old frames didn't have writing on them, so he goes to the back and files the print off the temple. She eventually decides that these are her frames and drops the charges against us. As she was walking out the door she tells me that the cops will keep me from doing this again.

  17. #17
    Master OptiBoarder Ginster's Avatar
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    Free Frames LOL

    Quote Originally Posted by PLStout View Post
    We had a LOL come in a few years back for new lenses in her frame. When she came back to pick up the specs she insisted that we had stolen her old frames and replaced them with some cheap ones. We talked to her for a while but she insisted she was right and called the cops. The police show up and get some info from her and I. He then proceeds to ask her more about her glasses. She said they had a little scratch on the temple, so he goes to the back and scratches the temple. She then states that the old frames didn't have writing on them, so he goes to the back and files the print off the temple. She eventually decides that these are her frames and drops the charges against us. As she was walking out the door she tells me that the cops will keep me from doing this again.
    This is funny, If You Can't Sell E'm Give them away, or better yet, switch out old frames when they come in for new ones, after all, it's just money,Ha Ha Ha, I love that Cop. :cheers::hammer::hammer::cheers:

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    After more than 35 years in the business, this one even suprised me:

    Last week a contact patient of ours came into the office and told the receptionist that she needed contacts but didn't have any money. She asked the girl if she thought the doctor would give her some free ones if she "serviced" him.

    Without missing a beat (or asking the doctor) the girl told her no she didn't think so.

    The patient left.

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    My favorite are the patients that have been wearing glasses for years. At the end of the refraction I check OU acuity. I tell the patients that they are 20/15 which is even better than 20/20. Someone always says "so I don;t need glasses?"

    Yeah, because I just performed a miracle while you were behind there!:hammer:

  20. #20
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    I had an older gentleman come in and inquire about an exam he had somewhere else.

    he stated "The doctor told me I have cadillacs in my eyes and that is why I can't see clearly. I don't understand how something so big got in there!?" :hammer:

  21. #21
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    Had a patient today with -19.00 contacts, lost one asked if I had something he could wear until his comes in.

  22. #22
    Is it November yet? Jana Lewis's Avatar
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    My favorite is " are my lenses going to have this writing on them?"
    :hammer:
    Jana Lewis
    ABOC , NCLE

    A fine quotation is a diamond on the finger of a man of wit, and a pebble in the hand of a fool.
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    I had a lady bring in a frame to be soldered, she left them with me for a couple of hours and then returned to pick them up. She went off on me when I put them on her, she ranted and raved about them not being hers. She said she had trifocals,(this pair had bifocals). I proceeded to explain to her that these were her glasses...on and on it went.
    Finally I said, you know what mame, maybe these aren't your glasses, but they are in fact the ones you brought in for me to repair! Her husband looked at me like I was crazy, then he grabbed the glasses from her. He inspected them and announced that they were HIS old glasses.
    That was 4-5 years ago, I haven't seen them since.

    Another time a lady accused me of selling her used frames. She had family in the military and she knew that they were issued glasses. She claimed that the glasses that she got from me were used, because the owners named was stamped on the temple. His name was Colonel Gary Fade.
    Well the frame was marked COL. GRAY FADE! I don't think she ever was convinced that that was the color of the frame, but, she left.

  24. #24
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    This was my own stupidity but I can remember when I was very young, a friend of mine did some damage to my mother's new car (the only new one she ever owned). I fixed the damage but neede some touch-up paint. I can remember argueing with the man behind the parts counter that this paint was (marked Lt. Green) leutenant green, not light green!

    Chip

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    Here's one I see all the time, especially with the elderly patients...They'll put on the glasses, bend over and shake head vigorously, and then say they're too loose because they slipped when they did that. I tell them I didn't realize they made a habit of bending over and shaking their head rapidly from side to side when I fit the glasses the first time. Another one I'm sure you've all seen is the patient pull hard on the glasses and complain, "they move when I do this!"

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