What Is The Stupidest Question You Have Been Asked

[chip anderson]

"How long does de' medcine last in these (over the counter readers).
Second question I'm getting to where I need them (she's 47), will it need stronger ones later? "
"It may increase as you get older."
"When does it stop changing?"
"Usually late 50's to age 60."
" Well then I thing I'll wait 'til it stops changing.."


Chip:shiner:

[mrmac]

A woman asked me to adjust her glasses
She said..." My glasses are always crooked... I have one ear lower than the other .. thats because I only wear one ear ring.

You just cann't make this stuff up

[AdmiralKnight]

We used to have this guy come in about once a month. At the time I was working at a chain, and he defiantly did NOT get his glasses from us. The frames were probably 20 years old, old solid metal frame, felt like steel. He had about a +20 in both eyes, glass, as well as a scope in the right lens. It was pretty darned cool to see, especially since the company I worked for barely carried 3 different types of progressive, and I had only been licensed for about 2 years at that point.

Anyhoo, he'd come in once a month to get them adjusted. The nose pad arms would come un-screwed, not the pads themselves, but they were actually screwed into the front of the frame. So he'd come in to get them tightened, etc etc. I didn't mind helping the guy out, but he was a bit of a jerk, and quite the pig, so none of my girls liked dealing with him, "I'll get the manager." Thanks. lol

One day he comes in, his helper dog leading the way, and hands me a second, identical pair of glasses, and gives me a big story. the scope in the second pair was broken, but the carrier lens was perfect and the scope was still glued tightly into the lens. However on the pair he was wearing, the scope was fine, but the lens was cracked, and the scope would come right out.

At this point in the story I was starting to get a bit worried

"So, basically, what I'd like you to do is take the broken scope out of the good lens, and put the good scope into the good lens."

Oh boy.

I tell him I REALLY do not feel comfortable doing that, but he insists, saying that he can't wear the one with the broken scope anyway, so it was no big deal. Alright, here I go. I must have spent a good 15 minutes trying to get the scope out. Of course, I don't have any of the necessary materials to break down the glue and get the scope out, so I was really just trying to somehow break the glue enough to squeeze the scope out. I go back and explain I can't do it... but he insists I keep trying, and I feel bad for the man, so i give it another go... and another 10 minutes. Eventually i come back and say

"Look, the only way I'm going to get this out is to force it. And if I force it, the carrier lens is going to break. No ifs ands or buts. It WILL break."

Try anyway.

Okie dokie. I donned my safety glasses and grab my lens pliers (the only tool I had that would hold onto the front side of the lens while pushing on the back of the scope) and I squeezed... and sure enough, the lens exploded in my hands. The best part of the whole situation was that lab had a window right above the working area so you could see into the dispensary... and he was standing about 10 feet from the window, so not only did he hear the horrendous sound, but he saw it explode as well.

I went back out, apologized, and pretty much said I told you so, and he left. We never saw him again. The girls were quite happy about that lol

(wow, I didn't mean to write so much :hammer:)

[Happylady]

(wow, I didn't mean to write so much :hammer:)

That's okay, it was a very good story!

[chip anderson]

Had an attractive spoiled rich young woman in the other day wearing a Channel sunglass. She wanted it adjusted. The adjustment was near perfect but I fooled with it a little and told her it looked just fine. She put it on, looked in the mirror, then promptly put it on the top of her head. She shook her head and gave them back to me.
Said: "These don't fit on top of my head. My girlfriend's fit on her face and on top of her head. I want them to fit on top of my head when I wear them there."

I tried to explain that if they fit her face they wouldn't fit on top of her head (didn't say anything about her being a pinheaded idiot). She left very unhappy and I am sure in search of an optician that could make them fit both places.

Chip

[Radio Star]

I've had this same experience, Chris. A girl comes in, practically throws her Chanel sunglasses on the dispensing counter and declares "these are crooked." I put them on her, check the fit, put on my best "aw, shucks" face and tell her that they fit just fine. She look at me like I'm nuts, rams them on top of her head and says "no, see, they're crooked. Can't you fix that?"

I took at least a good thirty seconds for me to be able to give her a civil response.

[fjpod]

This one was a statement by a patient, not a question, but I thought it fit here. Now I've heard it all.

I examined a 20/70 myopic 28 year old male the other day who wanted a routine checkup, but admitted he never wore his glasses. So I asked him if he thought he needed to wear his glasses for driving, especially at night. He said no, " I don't need to see perfectly, I just look at my GPS to see where I am going." :hammer:

Not only can't he see, he's not even looking at the road.

[Ginster]

How about the one someone phones in can you fix my glasses

They cal in and say, My glasses broke, can you fix them?:hammer:
Sure hand them through the phone:drop:

[tmorse]

E-mail:

I'm very interested in your course.

Can you guarantee that I will pass?

(sigh):hammer:

[pechsp]

We get a call once a week at least here at the lab with someone asking us if they can get a clear polarized lens. :hammer:

[finefocus]

We get a call once a week at least here at the lab with someone asking us if they can get a clear polarized lens. :hammer:

In the old days, you almost could. AO made "Neutral Polaroid". Laminated glass, very light in color, kind of a tan #1.

[pechsp]

the tan 1 polarized yes, but these people literally want a clear lens with the benefits of polarization

[obxeyeguy]

the tan 1 polarized yes, but these people literally want a clear lens with the benefits of polarization

Take a plano lens, sell it to them for a the cost of a prog poly lens, and see how many you get back. They won't really know, as obviously they have no optical backround.

[finefocus]

the tan 1 polarized yes, but these people literally want a clear lens with the benefits of polarization

Looks like a business opportunity - who among us can we get to manufacture these? We'll package them with the magic pinhole specs that cure nearsightedness, astigmatism, and the yaws. And if you act now, a vacuum pump!

[chip anderson]

Why did that screw loosen? Why did that screw come out?
How come that six year old piece fishing line mount broke?

[melthemadhatter]

1) "Do you know what you're doing?" I have no idea what I have been doing for the past nine years!

2) "Can you put medicine in my glasses?" 'Nuff said!

3) "Can I buy glasses that make me look like Sarah Palin?" (Ahem... Perhaps plastic surgery is an option?)

[melthemadhatter]

the tan 1 polarized yes, but these people literally want a clear lens with the benefits of polarization

There was an old episode of CSI that aired several years ago which had clear glass polarized lenses. I was furious and haven't watched the show since!

[sharpstick777]

Patient puts specs on dispensing table and points out that one temple is a little higher than the other....."My glasses are crooked. Can you fix that?"

I always start mentioning where to cut and raise the ear and usually they are happier after that.

Sharpstick

[jjm_1965]

Years ago, a customer came up to me and said "I need glasses." I asked for his prescription. He said "I need a prescription for glasses?" I said "Yes. Have you had an eye exam?" He said, "No. I don't need one. I know I need glasses." Before you ask, he was not referring to readers.

My brain hurt that day.

[chip anderson]

Had one yesterday with the Rx +0.50 2.50 add. Patient says he's not sure he will fill the Rx because "that prescription may hurt my farsightedness at distance." No matter how much I assured him that his doctor was honest, and very competnet (this one is) patient is still debating with himself about this. Patient is convinced that he needs Plano with a +3.00 add. I told him at lenght that +3.00 adds in a progressive (which he insists on) don't tend to make the patient happy.

Another good related question: "Why does the patient believe that stronger is always better?" If this were true we would always put the strongest lens we can grind on every patient and dispense with the exam.

Chip

[GAgal]

1. "My nosepad fell off so I superglued it to my frame and got glue all over my lenses, can you get the glue off?" Super glue should be a controlled substance
2. "I don't know what my vision insurance is, can you tell me what it covers?" Sure, let me pull out my magic 8 ball. Does it covers progressives? Highly unlikely
3. "Why do I have to have an eye exam to wear contacts?" Because your placing something directly onto your eye, maybe
4. When they ask my 20 year old apprentice if he's the doctor (because he's the only man in the place) and they ignore the rest of us
5. "Do you work here?" No lady, I'm just wearing the name tag and answering the phone for fun
6. Patient walks in and says, "Are these the glasses you sell?"

[DragonLensmanWV]

Just give these people their signs!:bbg::D:cheers:

[fjpod]

I'm so glad I revived this thread. It had been dormant for over two years.

[GAgal]

I'm so glad I revived this thread. It had been dormant for over two years.

So Am I! It's been great to vent and know that I'm not the only crazy magnet around! If there is a loon within a 30 mi radius, they are instantly attracted to me!

[optigrrl]

We get a call once a week at least here at the lab with someone asking us if they can get a clear polarized lens. :hammer:

Funny I actually had a guy argue with me that one existed.