What Is The Stupidest Question You Have Been Asked

[lindalou]

When checking the PD on someone, especially a child. I say "Look at the open eye(while closing the other one) now, without moving your head,look at this open eye." (pointing at the other eye)

I don't know how many will "wink" at me. If there are kids, I usually tell them, that if they wink at me again, that makes me their girlfriend. Amazing, they stop and are so wide eyed (and red) mom is usually laughing.

[MarcE]

Here's one you don't get too often:

"Did you kill that guy?" Refering to the bloody corpse next door on the sidewalk.
It still is a decent neighborhood - never (yet) had a frame lifted.

[scograd]

I had a patient tell me that I should read "The Secret". He also claimed that the tools he learned in there would keep him from needing reading glasses. Hope they come out with the book in large print then for him!!!

[k12311997]

Here's one you don't get too often:

"Did you kill that guy?" Refering to the bloody corpse next door on the sidewalk.
It still is a decent neighborhood - never (yet) had a frame lifted.

Yes, he wanted a rufund.

[mrmac]

This was how the phone call went;

Him Can you tell me the price of a BASIC pair of lense?

me Do you mean single vision?

him No... progresive in polycarb

me You want a polycarb progressive?

him Yes.. in transition with a/r

me So you want a BASIC poly progressive .. transition with anti relective coating?

him Yes... Does that cost extra?

[DragonLensmanWV]

While we're at it here we might want to start a new thread entitled "The rudest client ever..." but this one does kind of fit in with the stupidest questions theme of the current thread.

A gruff, impersonable gent who had purchased from us in the past, enters the dispensary one day, and before even saying hello to me or myself having the opportunity to greet him, he tosses a business card from one of our local 'deep-discount', 'ever-advertising-a-sale' retailers on the dispensing table and asks, matter-of-factly and with a smug look on his mug, "Bet you can't match THIS price." We're just TOO expensive, it seems,so this time he went and shopped around. Does like our service and expertise, though. My heart sinks, I'm thinking "well here we go again, lets see if they're even in the ballpark." I quickly review the price itemization, confirm on a piece of paper with the calculator and price list what our price is and answer,
" Yes, sir, I most certainly would be happy to match the price you have here!" He looks rather astonished that I would so very quickly offer to match a price that he obviously felt was a bargain, and we set about writing up the order. During this time, he's going on and on about how terrible it is for glasses to cost as much as they do, what a terrible mark-up there is, and how unfair it is to consumers that they have to do what he did and ask around if other opticals would price match (after all, it costs money and time, did I know this, for consumers to be forced to shop around.) And how unfair it is to the poor schmuck who doesn't know that glasses can be bargained on, and stupidly pays the full regular price. During this non-stop tangent of his, I'm not saying a word other than requesting information for the job. I'm also not responding to the questions he's asking me about mark-up, etc. He rises, ready to leave, and walks towards the door. At this point, I simply cannot contain myself any longer, and blurt out what I wanted to ever since I first saw the price written by the competition on the card, " Sir, I'm more than happy to match the price you got from XYZ. But, I really feel guilty about it because, well, their sale price is actually $75.00 MORE than our regular price is!"

Now you all know what comes next, right?

"Well, can you not match the price and charge me what you would have normally?"

I would have kept the difference and bought pizza for the office.

[renee1111]

This was how the phone call went;

Him Can you tell me the price of a BASIC pair of lense?

me Do you mean single vision?

him No... progresive in polycarb

me You want a polycarb progressive?

him Yes.. in transition with a/r

me So you want a BASIC poly progressive .. transition with anti relective coating?

him Yes... Does that cost extra?

BAH HA HA!!!!! That's hilarious! Love it!


Keep 'em comming people

[allanon]

"What's a U-Turn?"

[For-Life]

Me: Would you like AR? Customer: Yes!
Me: Would you like Transitions? Customer: Yes!
Me: Would you like a thinner lens? Customer: Yes?
Customer: I want that Tommy Hilfiger frame too.
Me: Okay, the total price is XXXX
Customer: Doesn't welfare pay the full price?

[obxeyeguy]

Customer: Doesn't welfare pay the full price?

You: Oh, you have insurance. Let me figure up your part. Well, your part comes to $xxxx
customer: well, thats a lot, How much did welfare pay?
You: NOTHING, they give you glasses, this is eyewear!

[renee1111]

Me: So you need a lined bifocal.

Customer: The frames are so small, are you sure you can fit a bifocal in there?

Me: Actually, most of the styles are the semi-rimeless or "half frames" which we can customize and make to your specifications. So I wouldn't even worry about it.

I pick out a semi rim for her, (looks great by the way)

Customer: the frame is so small, your sure we can fit a bifocal, right?

Me: Yes, I'm sure, I can make the lens deeper to accomodate it, not a problem.

I pick out another semi rim

Customer: Oh, this frame is too small I think, you'll never be able to fit a bifocal in there.

Me: Like i said, I can customize it for you, don't worry about it..

This went on and on for every frame I picked, by the 9th frame, I finally just said "It's very complicated, but don't worry, I will make sure you can see clearly out of your new lenses!"

[k12311997]

non optical, but the stupid question I have ever been witness to.

"do you Jen take this man to have and to hold, from this day forward, for better, for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness or in health, to love and to cherish 'till death do you part?"

[SarahMP584]

" I guess I will take this frame since it is the ONLY small one/big one you have."
"You dont have ANYTHING BIG enough for a TRIFOCAL. I guess I will have to go to ____"
Fine with me, you can be their problem....

[EyeSeeYou]

Me: Would you like AR? Customer: Yes!
Me: Would you like Transitions? Customer: Yes!
Me: Would you like a thinner lens? Customer: Yes?
Customer: I want that Tommy Hilfiger frame too.
Me: Okay, the total price is XXXX
Customer: Doesn't welfare pay the full price?

ROFLMAO........:angry: That gets me everytime. Then, you attempt to explain to the Ohio Medicaid's that the state of Ohio has already pre-selected PRECISELY which frames that their insurance will cover entirely. You have to explain to them that their insurance will only cover the lenses if they select any of the eyeglass frames that their insurance carrier OFFERS to them for absolutely FREE. Despite numerous explanations on part of the optician, customers with this insurance will STILL experience anguish and puzzlement over issues of not only price (free isn't "good enough") and issues of "cosmetic appeal". They will still choose to argue with you, asking if they choose an expensive frame, will Medicaid pay for the lenses in its entirety, and will Medicaid take care of at least half of the price of the frame alone? (The answer: NO!)
Customer: "Wait, so you mean my {cough, cruddy} insurance won't pay anything towards two-hundred dollar plus Burberry frame? Not even for lenses?":hammer::hammer::hammer:

[EyeSeeYou]

This was how the phone call went;

Him Can you tell me the price of a BASIC pair of lense?

me Do you mean single vision?

him No... progresive in polycarb

me You want a polycarb progressive?

him Yes.. in transition with a/r

me So you want a BASIC poly progressive .. transition with anti relective coating?

him Yes... Does that cost extra?

LOL next they will be asking about a "basic" pair of Varilux Ellipse 360 lenses with extremely thin and light-weight "basic" lenses in a 1.74 index and top-notch "basic" Crizal Alize in a "basic" pair of half-rimless, hypo-allergenic, titanium-embedded, 100% nickel-free London Fog eyeglasses. Oh, did we mention that the top metal part of the eyeglasses have a prism-changing "basic" color that will transform into several inspiring "basic" luminescent shades of aquamarine once exposed to the ultra-violet rays of the sun?
Yes, OH SO BAAASIC. lol

[EyeSeeYou]

Me: So you need a lined bifocal.

Customer: The frames are so small, are you sure you can fit a bifocal in there?

Me: Actually, most of the styles are the semi-rimeless or "half frames" which we can customize and make to your specifications. So I wouldn't even worry about it.

I pick out a semi rim for her, (looks great by the way)

Customer: the frame is so small, your sure we can fit a bifocal, right?

Me: Yes, I'm sure, I can make the lens deeper to accomodate it, not a problem.

I pick out another semi rim

Customer: Oh, this frame is too small I think, you'll never be able to fit a bifocal in there.

Me: Like i said, I can customize it for you, don't worry about it..

This went on and on for every frame I picked, by the 9th frame, I finally just said "It's very complicated, but don't worry, I will make sure you can see clearly out of your new lenses!"

ROFLMAO.
Just imagine if you attempted to explain the Shamir Piccolo Progressive to customers.
You: {launching into your speech} "Well, you see, with the advances of technology, we now have designed a particular type of progressive lens known as the Shamir Piccolo. The Piccolo, as we opticians refer to it as, is an advanced progressive lens that has been specifically designed for the more contemporary, smaller frames that have come into fashion as of late. I would recommend the Piccolo for any of the smaller frames, such as an Aspen, a London Fog Frame, or some of the smaller Humphrey/Eschenbach frames we have browsed today."
Customer: {obviously baffled beyond mortal comprehension} "Excuse me, but what does a MUSICAL INSTRUMENT such as a SMALL FLUTE have anything on God's Green Earth to do with a PROGRESSIVE lens??!?!??"
You: :drop:{Thinking: WTF. . .Is it possible for people to be this DUMB?}

LOL @ misunderstandings!

[AngryFish]

I worked with a doctor who responded to a patient saying “ok I will see you next time” by saying “Well if you wait as long as you did the last time I’ll be dead”

[Cindy K]

non optical, but the stupid question I have ever been witness to.

"do you Jen take this man to have and to hold, from this day forward, for better, for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness or in health, to love and to cherish 'till death do you part?"

ROLFMHO!!!!! That is THE universal stupid question. I was tempted to give a good pause, look Rudy up and down, and say, 'I guess....'.

[chip anderson]

"What made you choose this for a career?"

"I needed a job and this one was open."

[k12311997]

ROLFMHO!!!!! That is THE universal stupid question. I was tempted to give a good pause, look Rudy up and down, and say, 'I guess....'.

Actually Cindy I wrote that in a moment of depression. The thing that makes that ironic to me is that Jen,my now ex wife, making the promise to work through thick and thin and not just bale when there is hard times. .

[SarahMP584]

"What made you choose this for a career?"

"I needed a job and this one was open."

I love this one....
They also ask, very suspiciously, "how long did you have to go to school to do this??"

[wolfman]

We are running a special this month. Buy one pair of glasses and get the other one 1/2 off. It states clearly both frame and lens. What Question did I get? "Do I have to buy the lenses too? Or can I just by the frames, And still get the discount?"

[foureyes]

a woman called to tell us she was having problems with her vision.

woman: i am having a problem with my vision
us: well, can you describe the problem?
woman: yeah, when i take my glasses off i can't see anything.
us: *awkward silence*....but when you put them on?
woman: well, it's fine when they're on but as soon as i take them off i can't see anything!

wow.

[renee1111]

woman: i am having a problem with my vision
us: well, can you describe the problem?
woman: yeah, when i take my glasses off i can't see anything.
us: *awkward silence*....but when you put them on?
woman: well, it's fine when they're on but as soon as i take them off i can't see anything!

wow.

That's a good one! It's amazing how dozy some people can be!

[scograd]

Indirectly asked by a 7 year old while her mother was being examined by me... "did she go to mental school?"

Mother: "No honey, it's not mental school, it's medical school."

Sometimes I feel like it might well have been mental school!!!