The Original Hollywood Squares
These great questions and answers are from the "Hollywood Squares" game show. Peter Marshall was the host asking the questions.
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Q. Do female frogs croak?
A. (Paul Lynde): If you hold their little heads under water long enough.
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Q. If you're going to make a parachute jump, at least how high should you be?
A. (Charley Weaver): Three days of steady drinking should do it.
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Q. True or False, a pea can last as long as 5,000 years.
A. (George Gobel): Boy, it sure seems that way sometimes.
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Q. You've been having trouble going to sleep. Are you probably a man or a woman?
A. (Don Knotts): That's what's been keeping me awake.
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Q. According to Cosmo, if you meet a stranger at a party and you think that he is attractive, is it okay to come out and ask him if he's married?
A. (Rose Marie): No, wait until morning.
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Q. Which of your five senses tends to diminish as you get older?
A. (Charley Weaver): My sense of decency.
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Q. In Hawaiian, does it take more than three words to say "I Love You"?
A. (Vincent Price): No, you can say it with a pineapple and a twenty.
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Q. What are "Do It," "I Can Help," and "I Can't Get Enough"?
A. (George Gobel): I don't know, but it's coming from the next apartment..
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Q. As you grow older, do you tend to gesture more or less with your hands while talking?
A. (Rose Marie): You ask me one more growing old question Peter, and I'll give you a gesture you'll never forget.
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Q. Paul, why do Hell's Angels wear leather?
A. (Pauk Lynde): Because chiffon wrinkles too easily.
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Q. Charley, you've just decided to grow strawberries. Are you going to get any during the first year?
A. (Charley Weaver): Of course not, I'm too busy growing strawberries.
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Q. In bowling, what's a perfect score?
A. (Rose Marie): Ralph, the pin boy.
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Q. It is considered in bad taste to discuss two subjects at nudist camps. One is politics, what is the other?
A. (Paul Lynde): Tape measures.
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Q. During a tornado, are you safer in the bedroom or in the closet?
A. (Rose Marie): Unfortunately Peter, I'm always safe in the bedroom.
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Q. Can boys join the CampFireGirls?
A. (Marty Allen): Only after lights out.
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Q. When you pat a dog on its head he will wag his tail. What will a goose do?
A. (Paul Lynde): Make him bark?
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Q. If you were pregnant for two years, what would you give birth to?
A. (Paul Lynde): Whatever it is, it would never be afraid of the dark.
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Q. According to Ann Landers, is there anything wrong with getting into the habit of kissing a lot of people?
A. (Charley Weaver): It got me out of the army.
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Q. While visiting China, your tour guide starts shouting, "Poo! Poo! Poo!", what does this mean?
A. (George Gobel): Cattle crossing.
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Q. It is the most abused and neglected part of your body, what is it?
A. (Paul Lynde): Mine may be abused but it certainly isn't neglected.
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Q. Back in the old days, when Great Grandpa put horseradish on his head, what was he trying to do?
A. (George Gobel): Get it in his mouth.
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Q. Who stays pregnant for a longer period of time, your wife or your elephant?
A. (Paul Lynde): Who told you about my elephant?
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Q. When a couple have a baby, who is responsible for its sex?
A. (Charley Weaver): I'll lend him the car, the rest is up to him.
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Q. Jackie Gleason recently revealed that he firmly believes in them and has actually seen them on at least two occasions. What are they?
A. (Charley Weaver): His feet
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Q. According to Ann Landers, what are two things you should never do in bed?
A. (Paul Lynde): Point and Laugh
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